


The story of my life

by oceandolfin



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Autobiographical, Finding Love, Heartbreak, M/M, Non Magical, OOC, Romance, ron as a story teller, spanning decades, unspecified place, unspecified time in history
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-15
Updated: 2015-04-07
Packaged: 2018-03-01 14:56:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 45,617
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2777300
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oceandolfin/pseuds/oceandolfin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Every one has a story to tell, filled with poignant moments whether it be love or lust, faith or betrayal ,truth or lies, good or bad, sin or virtue, moral or deviance, frailty or strength, tears or smile, possession or surrender, jealousy or devotion, union or dissolution...it does not matter.. What matters is a life lived.. So here is story of my life in my own words..</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The beginning

**Author's Note:**

> I know I have two unfinished stories to complete but the idea of this one could not just let me go so I had to write it. it will be multi chaptered story set in non magical universe. I have written it in autobiographical way.. Any type of comment good or bad would be appreciated. As always, borrowing beloved characters from Rowling and playing with them in world I have created.

Story of my life.....

I believe that the world began with story. When Adam and Eve were banished to earth, first thing they did was recount stories about garden of Eden, the lush green gardens, the beautiful exquisite flowers, bountiful trees and ever tempting apple of knowledge. As their brood grew, so were the stories about brothers Cain and Abel or how Noah saved mankind.. From the walls of caves, through engravings in stone or writings in delicate papyrus and parchments...as we progressed from savages to civilized so did our tales. A simple fable to eponymous sagas...everybody loves a good story but what defines a good story? Should it contain daredevil adventures or should it be an epic love story filled with longings and desires..or a hard hitting reality to make us confront our frailty and question our morality..or evergreen good v/s evil conflict..or a lesson to be learnt. What should I know about these deeper things. I, sixth born son of a poor family born in a quaint little village ,uneducated, naive to ways of the world. But like everybody else, I have my own life's story. You may either love it or hate it or may be indifferent to it but this is my truth. Who am I? you will ask. Why is my story so important that it need your time or attentions? Am I a famous historical figure, a hero maybe or a revolutionary or great adventurer or crazy inventor of some kind? Sorry to disappoint you all, I am neither of these, just a simple man with a story to tell.

Every story they say has three acts, beginning, middle and the end. So let me start at beginning. As I have already said, I was the sixth born son in a large mostly happy family living in .. I guess exact specifics is not required so a little village will suffice. All I can reminisce about my childhood is constant ribbing of my big brothers who had made their life mission to torture and torment me to no end. I think I was a threat to them, an extra mouth to feed, extra body to be clothed or extra kid to share toys with. Not all my brothers were same. The elder ones had outgrown the sibling rivalry and ignored me most of the time. My Pa was busy providing for feeding seven sets of mouth. He was a good man, my Pa, hard working, honest and overall merry good fellow. The burden of large family had aged him prematurely but still best memories of my childhood are of my Pa in rare free time playing his beloved flute by the fireplace where we all gathered around the during the cold winters. I could imagine him as a young carefree lad before the harsh reality of life had imprinted its lines on his face. As other kids my age, I was sent to village school to learn the alphabets and to add or subtract. I won't lie that I was extraordinary talent to make my story interesting because I barely scraped through. Most of my childhood revolved around helping my father and brothers in the farm. I think I was good at it..milking cows, cleaning sheds and making hay and going hunting with Neville.

Neville was my closest pal. He was an orphan whose parents died in house fire and lived in abusive environment with his overbearing grandmother who blamed poor boy for death of her son and daughter in law.. Often than not, Neville used to stay at my place. What was addition to one to already brood of nine and my mum was fond of poor little Neville. He was shy plump kid prone to clumsiness but with golden heart. He forgave his grandma for every cruelty and unkind words hurled at him. The sight of her used to make me hit someone or something hard but he was always stoic and noble, my Neville. We used to go to wander in forests and talked about what we would do when we grow up. Neville was fond of plants. He was excellent gardner. I used to watch him tend to his plants so tenderly and gracefully that all traces of that awkward boy used to vanish before my eyes. I loved watching him then. His grandma in her fit of rage had once burnt his little garden and I do not know how I had controlled my impulse to kill her but the very next day Neville started work in his garden all over again as if nothing had happened. He was my rock and also my first love.

You can not ever forget your first love. I was brought up among five hot blooded brothers who worked hard and drank harder and invariably the chatter and gossip used to revolve around bonny lasses. The big breasts, shapely asses, soft skins and delicious moans. They were all players, my brothers and as usual I was the odd one out. The female species was mystery to me and frankly, I was scared of them. My first experience with a girl was traumatic one when local milkmaid Lavender attacked me, pushed me on ground and proceeded to snog me senseless. I was too stunned to react and did know where to touch. It was during times like this, I wish I had cool swagger of my brothers. In spite of hearing every day various techniques to pleasure women from my boisterous siblings, I failed to satisfy her and finally she took pity on me and took matters on her own hand and I became a man at ripe age of fifteen.

Even after daily romp in hay with pretty Lavender, I found myself getting more and more frustrated. Lavender was a pretty girl with ample assets and I was certainly the centre of jealousy among my brothers for ensnaring her but I longed more for friendly touches of Neville instead of hot and sweaty makeout sessions with Lavender. The way Neville used to look at me, it made me felt that maybe I was not the one of the Weasley boys, maybe there was something in me worth looking. He made me felt desired and it was everything for someone who was mostly ignored like me needed . With Lavender I was the body to quench the lust but when I was with Neville, I was someone who mattered. I still dream of that moonlit night when Neville and I kissed for the first time. I wish I had been more educated or well read to write in beautiful words what I felt then but deep inside me, I know sometimes words just fail you. The way Neville melted under my touch, his closed eyelashes fluttering over his skin, trembling hands with which he held me and breathless moans of my name from his kiss swollen mouth, I had never felt something as pure and as sensual ever. After that Neville and me were inseparable. We learned new ways to discover same pleasure and ecstasy. I was young, carefree and happy. We planned our future together. A little farm with a sweet little garden brimming with daffodils, lilies, roses and hydrangeas. Me and Neville growing old as merry bachelors. Of course none of it happened otherwise there would have been no story to tell because every story has damn little twist but mine came in the form of Cedric Diggory.

Cedric was local hero, the boy who got out. I meant he was only one in our village who left everything in search of unknown. The family you create, habits you acquire and your day to day routine gives you a blanket of comfort from uncertainties of life. You do not want to tread outside your self made cocoon, only daredevils do that. Cedric was one such dreamer. He was an artist and all the beautiful murals in our local church had been painted by him. Could a little farming village with living population of five hundred including live stock ever value an artist. He was ridiculed and ran away. I was seven at that time even seven year old me found it to be stupid and fool hardy action. And years later he came back. He was now some bohemian artist and photographer while we all were still same farmers toiling our lands. Even the most staunch of his opponents now held him with a grudge of respect.

I was sixteen that summer when he first returned and was completely in awe of him. It seemed that he never belonged to our village. His anecdotes of life abroad fascinated me. Neville used to laugh at my open eyed wonder and hero worship. Cedric was like a breath of fresh air bringing with him mysteries of places foreign to me.. their smells, sounds and stories. I was enamoured with these unknown people, songs they sang, lives they lived and wanted to live this different life vicariously through Cedric. He took pity on me, perhaps, because he always satisfied my curiosity. He promised he would take me for a ride to that world one day while every one in my family scoffed at the preposterous ideas he planted in my head.. He left with his promise hanging in air and leaving me unquenched thirst for more.Life continued with same old sowing and reaping seasons, cows to be milked, barns to be filled but a tiny little part of me still yearned and dreamt. Neville tried his best to calm the torments of it and then Cedric came back and with him came a tornado which swept my life upside down.

It was the worst farming season in history of our community and all our crops failed. The tempers were running high in my family, there was always food shortage and ugly drunken brawls and Neville's grandma had discovered our little secret and forbade him to keep any relations with me. I was miserable and very much frustrated and when Cedric sprang his bombshell surprise on us, everything exploded,

It so happened that during his previous stay, Cedric had taken some photographs of me and I had allowed him for which I had become source of ridicule to my family. In one of the pictures I was washing our cow without wearing my shirt and in another I was dozing off in hay with hat closing my eyes. There was nothing exceptional in those pictures and I looked the same..lanky too tall redhead with sunburnt skin and freckles all over the body which was characteristics of almost all my family. I was one of the Weasleys boys. My elder brother Bill could be called ruggedly handsome but rest of us were almost alike except maybe the colour of our eyes. Therefore it came as a shock to all of us when Cedric proclaimed that people in the city had loved my photographs and had offered me a job. We all believed that it was a practical joke even my Mum who doted on me never thought me as a good looking one. It was the serious tone of Cedric's voice which made us realise that may be it was not a joke after all. I was curious about the kind of job which can be offered only just by looking at the pictures of a person and not knowing about his skills or education status. Cedric explained that it was called modelling and I was perfect for it something about my height, muscles and rustic features which were much in demand. All I had to do was try on new clothes and let myself be clicked like babies on cereals packs or busty girls on beer cans. And it fetched great deal of money even more than what we earned by breaking our backs on farms for a year. This information was completely new to us. We had never stepped outside this village even once. My life was confined to green meadows, woods by river, local church and village market and now I was offered a chance  to step outside this familiar comforts. My family except my Ma readily agreed. What harm a few pictures could do and times were bad and we were genuinely in need of some money. My Ma opposed it thoroughly, she believed that world outside was big bad wolf who gobbles innocent babies like me. I was six foot giant in my family and my Ma thought her little baby would be harmed and finally the decision was left to me.

I still believe that if we were not in dire need of money that year, I would never have left. Yeah, I used to dream about life outside but unlike Cedric, I never had galls to take a single step and then there was Neville who I loved so much. Neville supported me in whatever decision I would make. He knew me more than myself, I guess. And in the end it was easy to say yes. I would go with Cedric, earn some good money and return back to my home and to Neville.

I can still see my last day at home as if it were yesterday. Mum had baked my favourite shepherd pie and chocolate cake. There were banners put on around the house and whole village had gathered around to bid me farewell. Nobody really believed that that youngest good for nothing Weasley boy was actually getting a job in the city. Even Lavender who had left me for big burly farmer was batting her eye lashes at me and telling all and sundry how talented I was. It was like fairy tale moment for me. The preparations and packing had taken too much of my time that I had really never given thought about this giant leap of my life. But there, standing among people I had grown up with and knowing that I would not see them tomorrow, that I would not wake up in my little bunk bed, drink milk directly from our cow, play cricket with my brothers, help my Pa in harvest and would not be able to kiss the soft plump lips of Neville or listen to his voice, I felt panic creeping inside me like fog in the winters. The life I had lived and known forever was going to disappear and I had no idea what future would bring. In my last act of desperation, I begged Neville to let me stay. I beseeched him to just say the words that he did not want me be to be go and I swore I would not leave his side. I loved him too much to leave him and perhaps he loved me too much to let go. I still hear his parting words when nights get too silent and cold," You have to go, Ron. It's in your destiny and your only chance and if we were made for each other, we would meet again." That was my first love noble, gentle, kind hearted Neville and I never saw him again.

Well, that was the beginning of my story. How a simple uncouth village lad took his first steps outside a world which was unknown and scary. As the carriage carrying me and Cedric trotted onwards, my little village and family started receding slowly away, getting distant and smaller and then it became invisible.


	2. The new place

Chapter 2

What struck me most when we reached my destination was lights. It was like Christmas never ended for these people and crowds. There were people all of them looking so busy. The people in my village always loitered around, sharing smoke and local gossips, playing cards. The work in farms could always wait one hour or two but here, men were bustling around as if the world was going to end tomorrow. Cedric nudged me in elbow whispering, "Welcome to your new life, Ron. I know it feels strange at first but then you get used to it. I have arranged for your lodgings but you have to share it with another man. Don't worry, he is a model like you."

"Won't you stay with me?" I was nervous as hell. Cedric was the only known face among the sea of others and I wanted to cling to it as longer as I could.

"Don't be daft. You are big boy now. I have my own place. Adrian would tell you about training and assignments. He kind of runs the agency and I scout for him."

Training, assignment, agency...words felt so foreign and ominous. I thought that I would get my pictures clicked just like Cedric had done. What sort of training you needed for that. If I was nervous before, now I felt scared as shit. We stopped before a building since it was dark, I could not make out much. I took my little suitcase with me. All through my life, I had worn second hand clothes of my brothers but for the first time in my life I was gifted a new pair of trousers and shirts by my family apart from that Neville had given my a potted plant for good luck. That accounted for my meagre worldly possessions when I arrived.

  
Cedric was asking a man in uniform about Adrian Pucey. It seemed that Pucey guy had not arrived yet so he left me alone on doorsteps telling me to wait for Adrian and went off.

  
This was my first experience of the new world, standing outside and shivering in the cold. The guard maybe took pity on me and let me inside. I leaned against the wall. All the weariness from the journey descended on me and I dozed off against the wall. I did not know for how long I had slept till I heard some unknown voice and someone was shaking my shoulders. I opened my eyes to see a tall man wearing a suit peering at me. He was smiling at my confusion. It took me some minutes to realise that this was my reality and my old home was now a dream.

The man extended his hands towards me, "You must be Cedric's new find. Ron..Williams?"

"Ronald Weasley, Sir." I replied shyly shaking hands with the man.

The man looked at me as I were bug under the magnifying glass muttering under his breath, " I can understand the appeal.. Wide eyed innocence with manly body.."

I prayed that I had satisfied what man wanted from me. I had come this far and I did not want to disappoint my family. We needed the money.

"Ok. Ron, Let's be clear before we sign our contract. You know what you would be doing right."

"Getting my pictures clicked, Sir."

The man started guffawing after hearing my reply. I was embarrassed and felt my cheeks getting hotter and turning red. I was scared that the man would kick me out after my gaffe.

"From which planet have you descended from, boy? I haver never heard such a ridiculous answer." the man was still laughing.

My skin was burning with shame and I said dejectedly," It is what Cedric told me, Sir. Am I being kicked out?"

"No, of course not. You are one of the rare specimen, I see. I fully intend to keep you, boy. I am Adrian Pucey. I run modelling agency and all our clients are rich and distinguished. That's what you need to know now. Rest you will learn by your own. Peter, take Ron to room 212, he would be sharing his room with Zabini."

"Zabini, Sir? Don't you think that Zabini would be too much for the boy." Peter, the assistant questioned.

"Well, Ron has to start somewhere. Who else is the best mentor except Blaise and also nobody else wants to live with him."

At that time, I was so tired that I was ready to share my bed with hippopotamus. I followed Peter quietly and reached my intended room. Peter knocked the door twice and a very pissed voice was heard from inside, "Who the hell is disturbing me at this bloody time?"

"It's me Peter, Blaise, here to introduce you to new room mate." Peter seemed to be enjoying goading the already angry man as the door blasted open.

Standing before me was a very furious and very handsome man. He had dark as coal eyes and smooth olive skinned and a body so muscular that his muscles could be seen rippling over the perfect abdomen. The man was clad only in boxers and I could not stop gaping at the man in awe and admiration. The man looked as if he was made to be captured in pictures or immortalised in paintings. The perfect male specimen. Who would want me in this agency when they had men like Zabini at their service.

"Ron, this is Blaise Zabini. Ron is our new recruit. So be kind to him."

With that Peter, the assistant was gone leaving me hovering around Blaise Zabini. Zabini was assessing me quietly with his dark eyes and I was squirming under his intense gaze. After few moments, he barked, "Do you intend to stay outside forever or are you coming in?"

I meekly went inside. However beautiful the man was, he was certainly not a clean person. My mum had beaten the cleanliness and tidiness inside me that I was shocked to see clothes flung around the room along with other things. The man picked up all the clothes from a bed and threw them down the floor, "here is your bed."

Why the people who had so much bothered so less about their things? The man had enough clothes to clad my whole village yet he seemed so disdainful of them. I fought the urge to fold them and keep them safe and clean. I dropped my little suitcase on bed and was little ashamed of how little I had as compared to other man. He was looking at me curiously. I had by now become used to such blatant looks. I was different to these men and I had to accept their curiosity or ridicule. Zabini was now lighting a cigarette and taking a puff, asked, "So, Ron, where are you from?"

My village was so little that hardly anyone knew it existed so I tried to explain but Zabini looked bored."Cedric found you. I guess they wanted new face for Malfoy & Co. I had heard the rumours that they had scouted all the agencies but nobody seemed to satisfy Draco Malfoy. I wonder how are you going to meet the criteria of Draco Malfoy's impossible standards. The bastard rejected me.. Look at me.. Imagine someone refusing me."

I could only nod my head at my roommate's rants. I was too exhausted to pay attention. As my head touched the pillow, I had gone asleep with someone talking about Malfoy something around somewhere.

I awoke to some noises overhead. It seemed that my new room mate and my new boss were arguing with each other regarding me.

"You have become too big for your boots, Zabini. You need to be shown your place."

"So, this village idiot would replace me.. Is n't it idiotic idea even for retard like you."

"Mind your language, Zabini. Remember it is me who have made you what you are. You were no better than this boy here when I found you, hustling in the streets."

"Of course, I remember,hon. How can I forget all the mansion, big cars and even a yacht you bought because of me."

"Yeah.. I had acknowledged it, didn't I but now this starry airs, late night partying and postponing important shoots.. It is getting out of hands. No doubt Malfoy rejected you."

"Shut up, Pucey. Do you think he will pick this lumberjack over me."

"That we will see, Zabini. For now, you would be sharing your room with the lumberjack and mentor him."

"In your dreams, Pucey. You know you will come begging back to me in your heels."

" We will see about that, Zabini. Tell Ron to meet me downstairs when he wakes up."

I pretended to be asleep for a while after Pucey had gone. I did not know where I had landed up. I had already made new enemies even before I had started . I was nervous. All I wanted was the money that was promised and after this modelling thing and then I would return back. It suddenly dawned on me that for the first time in my life I was alone in a world I knew nothing about. I had to learn things and I needed to placate Zabini.

"Wake up, sleeping beauty. This is not your kingdom, princess. Here you toil like rest of us, poor plebeians." Zabini was shouting near my ear.

In the golden rays of morning, he was looking even more beautiful and I could not help gawking at him. Who in their right mind would pick me over the finest male specimen. Being in his proximity made me aware of my imperfections. The only thing that consoled him was someone out here had liked my pictures enough to offer me a job.

"Are you staring at my body, you little fag?" the mocking words of Zabini broke through my musings.

"You are very handsome". I blurted out. God, could not I be more stupid. This man already looked down upon me as some idiot and I had only enforced his opinions. I stammered , "I am sorry. I was not supposed to say it loud."

My awkward situation seemed to amuse him more. Sometimes I liked to believe that Blaise was a kind of sadist. He loved teasing me and watching me grow red.

  
"Well, Since you have already said it, let me say thank you. Sadly I can't seem to say the same for you. I can not even imagine what are you doing here."

The condescending tone of Blaise pickled something inside me. I was always bad at controlling my temper being redhead and all . I bristled ," I was called here because someone must have been interested in me."

"Oh, the kitten has claws. Dear Pucey wants you downstairs, darlin'." Blaise practically purred and left the room. He seemed indifferent to my burst of temper. I really wanted him to like me. I was feeling lonely and even the company of arrogant Blaise Zabini was better than stewing in feeling of homesickness.

But today was my first day of new job which I practically was completely ignorant about. I took an elaborate bath and put on, in my opinion , my best set of clothes and braced myself to meeting Pucey.

Pucey was not alone. There were four other young men sitting besides him though Zabini was nowhere to be seen. My entrance piqued the curiosity of other guys like I was a new animal in zoo. I was introduced my Pucey to others.

Terry Boot was quieter type with brown soulful eyes and perfect aquiline nose. He had an intelligent air about him and he smiled at me warmly when he greeted me.  
Dean Thomas was only black guy present and he was gorgeous. He was even taller than me with perfect chocolate toned skin and friendly expressive face. Zacharis Smith and Michel Corner were two other guys blond, blue eyed with fine features and superior air around them. I hated them instantly.

"This is Ronald, boys. Our new recruit. You all behave with him okay."

"Really Pucey, Is he the one for Malfoy campaign. You got to be joking me." the man called Zacharis Smith sneered.

I was already expecting all the disdain pointed towards me from them. I did not care a damn about these rich handsome assholes who were looking at me like I were dirt under their expensive shoes.

"Where is Zabini, Ron?" Pucey was asking me and I shrugged my head.

"That bastard." Pucey muttered under his breath and after talking perfunctory glance at my clothes rolled his eyes and addressed Dean," Ok Dean, will you help Ron in selecting new clothes and send him up in our office by afternoon.

I knew I was a misfit here with my country clothes but I did not have money to buy new ones. I was panicking now as I knew I was surely be getting rejected.

"Let's go, mate." Dean was telling me.

"Err.. I am sorry but I do not have money to buy any more clothes." I replied blushing red. All through my childhood I hated being poor. I was youngest in family and therefore never owned anything new. These clothes were only things that were mine and it seemed that they were not good enough. I wondered what was I doing in a place like this.

"Oh... No you are getting new clothes for free. What is the point of being a model if you have to buy your clothes. You are not from here, are you? It had been ages I have seen someone as fresh as you. Sorry I did not mean to insult. This place sucks everything good out of you leaving you like a zombie. Seamus business is going to start soon and I would leave permanently."

The rest of the time, Dean talked about the guy called Seamus, love of his life. It happened that Dean met Seamus at some shoot where Seamus was sounds guy. They hit it off but poor Seamus was kicked off due to that. But he was starting some sound equipment business thing soon and then Dean and him would live together. Of course it seemed all greek and latin to me. But I could relate to stars in Dean's eyes and hundred watt smile he had when gushing about Seamus. It made me painfully aware of a boy I had left behind, his shy glances and gentle touches. I could picture in my mind exactly what Neville would be doing at this time making lunch for his grandma and watering those bloody chrysanthemums . The memory of Neville opened a dam of loneliness inside my heart which I was barely trying to hold together and I wanted to curl up and die.

"Ron...hey .. Why don't you try the clothes I have selected and let's see how you look in them." Dean was shaking my shoulder and thrusted clothes in my hand.

I had never touched such a silky fabric. It was blue shirt so soft that I spent minutes rubbing it against my skin and trousers looked as if it were made for my body. I was the tall and thin one in my family so all my pants were short around ankle and loose around hips. It was the first time, I was wearing clothes that actually fit me and shimmery blue colour of the shirt were same colour as my eyes. Even I could not recognise myself in mirror. It was like a fairy tale and then I berated myself for being so girly about it. I came out of the changing room and when Dean whistled at me, I felt inexplicably happy.

Dean bought me some more clothes and quickly I got tired off trying them and begged him to stop. We took a break at a coffee shop and had coffee and croissants. It was heavenly and they melted in my mouth. I was ready to live here permanently if I got to eat these delicious things. Dean was rather amused and told me that I would have to watch my weight lest I got fat. My family used to joke that I had bottomless pit for my stomach and I never gained a single stone however much I ate. So I made face at Dean and told him I was a growing boy which made him burst into laughter and remark, "You are too adorable".

I had great time with Dean and for the first time the prospect of living in this unknown place did not seem too frightening and scary. I would do 'shoot' whatever it was and enjoy my days here and go back to my village. I imagined regaling Neville with anecdotes about Pucey who looked like walrus and making him jealous with Zabini. I felt so much better when I entered the building where Pucey had his office with Dean.

He told me to go straight up to sixth floor and use lift. You won't believe if I told you that I had never used lift in my life. Dean reassured me and told me relax and just press the button and everything would be fine. I went inside and fumbled with buttons and heard sound of alarm setting off. It was then I realised I was not alone as I heard a furious voice coming behind me.

"You moron. What the hell you were thinking. Who fucking allowed you to enter this place."

If I thought Zacharis and Corner were the worst snobs I had seen in my life, the man standing before me would easily dethrone hundreds of them with a single arch of his eyebrow. He was too pretty for a man.He was goddamn beautiful. Everything was perfect about him, platinum almost white blond hair, exquisite grey eyes, delicate features and begging to be kissed lips but that proud turn of jaw seemed to mar his beauty. He looked as hard as a gorgeous porcelain statue. But enough was enough for me. I would not take any more cheek from these Greek God models after all Pucey wanted a meeting with me. So I replied back as angrily as I could.

" I work with the owner Mr Pucey so you better watch your tongue otherwise you would be listening from him."

"Is that so? Should I be worried about Mr Pucey?", the man drawled picking his nails.

The sight of that man standing calmly with air of superiority stoked the fires of my anger. I hissed, "This place belongs to Mr Pucey. And If I were you, I would not behave like a jackass."

My insult did make him raise his eyebrows and I could see silent fury inside his eyes.  
It did make me feel good and I was ready to insult him more but then the doors of lift opened and Pucey was standing before us. I smirked at the guy looking forward to Pucey scolding some sense in that inflated pretty head. But to my amazement, Pucey almost bowed down before the man simpering,"Mr Draco Malfoy. Finally meeting you in person at last. Your father and Mr Snape are so proud of your achievements. Don't mind my saying it but you are a prodigy, Sir."

"And here I was thinking that I was a jackass." the man drawled again looking at me.

Pucey was totally confused glancing at me and the man called Draco Malfoy. He cleared his throat and said, "So have you met Ron, he is in consideration for your ad compaign. Ron, this is Mr Draco Malfoy, heir to Malfoy & Snape, one of the biggest companies in the world.

"Mr Pucey. I am really starting to doubt my father's faith in you. Am I to really believe that this man here is going to be new face of Malfoy clothing lines. Go get your eyes or even better your head checked."

Suffice it to say that Pucey face became ashen white and he spluttered incoherently his apologises. As for me, everything was over. The flight of my dreams were curbed before they had even taken the wings. I had already in my mind started packing my suitcase and planning on taking next carriage to my home.

I wonder now what would have happened if I had really ran away that day when I first met Draco Malfoy of course then there would have been no story to tell.


	3. The struggle

Chapter 3 

"Redhead devil with red hot temper" for the largest part of my childhood, I remember being recognised by that epitaph. Of course, it had started with my breaking the hand of some boy who had stolen apple from me. Bullied frequently by my brothers, anger was my only way of self preservation and expressing myself. I remember lashing out at every one near me as if whole world was at odds with me. It was my friendship with mild mannered Neville which had pacified me somehow and I thought I had gotten some grip over my temper till the day I met Draco Malfoy. By now, you must be knowing how our first meeting went. Draco Malfoy had unique ability to transform me into a frothing rabid dog. The way he regarded me as someone utterly insignificant or a nobody brought dark days of my childhood back which I had tried too hard to suppress.

Draco Malfoy was scion of one of the biggest business company. Supposedly his father, Lucius Malfoy and his friend Severus Snape had started this company from the scratch and now they held control over almost every shops in the city. They had clothing lines, kitchen appliances and myriad other businesses under them and Draco Malfoy was the rising star, the one who would take the company to next level whatever that be. He was described in gossip columns as an articulate, shrewd man with sharp business acumen and his nick name was Don Juan in social circles. It was rumoured that he never bedded same person twice and was open to play for any time, whether male or female. The pretty face was his only weakness and bringing people down his speciality. He was as ruthless in his personal life as in his business dealings. Almost every beautiful women or even men had their heart broken by this shameless rake. The only one person whose opinions mattered to Draco Malfoy and the one he respected was his godfather Severus Snape. 

Severus Snape was referred to as an enigma. He seldom spoke but when he did, his words commanded absolute obedience. His parentage was said to be dubious. His mother was already pregnant with him when she married Tobias Snape, drunkard innkeeper. Both mother and child were abused regularly by the man. The unexpected death of Tobias Snape by fall from stairs was blessing in disguise for young Snape and he never looked back. Being an exceptionally talented student, he went to college on scholarships and forged a relationship with Lucius Malfoy and rest they is history. Snape never married and nobody knew the reason why. After the retirement Malfoy and Snape, Draco Malfoy was going to be sole heir of the company making him biggest catch of the town. 

Obviously, I did not know any of this when I first met Draco. That was my first day of work and I had already ruined all my chances. I remember the red lobster like face of Pucey after being derided by Draco Malfoy. He had rejected me outright calling me " bull headed oaf with hideous hair ". Poor Pucey had stammered his apologies but of no avail as Draco Malfoy stormed out of the building with his inflated head . We, me and Pucey stood there speechless for I do not know how many minutes, trying to grasp what had just happened. It would have looked so comical if my job was not at stake. I tried to apologise to Pucey but by then, he was furious beyond limits. It was his golden chance working for a prestigious client like Malfoy and Snape and I with my ignorance and stupidity had destroyed his career because it was an open secret that Draco Malfoy was a very vindictive man and never forgot any insult. He would definitely make sure that Pucey's agency get blown to dust. 

I ignored most of his rants. It was a silly misunderstanding and surely Pucey was being drama queen and making mountain of a mole hill. By evening, the news of my misadventures had reached to the ears of other boys and once again I was the butt of all jokes. I could not tolerate any more sneers of Zacharis and Michael so I retreated to my room to lick my wounds in peace only to find Blaise lounging comfortably in my bed. He looked really happy at me because my blunder had apparently made Pucey forgotten his own vanishing act. He found my encounter with Draco Malfoy very amusing and told me that it was high time some one called his majesty jackass. It seemed like Zabini and Malfoy had a bit of past and whatever had happened in the past had left bitter taste in Zabini's mouth. He patted me on my back and congratulated me. I was busy packing my bags to give attention to his unguarded enthusiasm. 

I had made plans to sneak away discreetly in early morning. Having spent a single day in this place had taught me only one thing that I was not made for this. I was really too oafish for all this finery and sophistication. My hair was too red, I had ugly freckles, too large nose, large hand and feet. Why would anybody even look at me if they have options of Zabinis, Zacharis or Michael Corners of the world. It was not my cup of tea. I knew I was being disappointment to my family but what could I do. Some things are just not meant for you. 

It was Zabini who pulled me from misery at that time. He was rather serious when he saw me packing my suitcase and asked me sharply, "What the hell do you think you are doing?" 

I replied dourly,"What does it look like I am doing. I am leaving. That's what you wanted right."

"Look I can't let the man who called Draco Malfoy jackass just run away. You are too precious to let go."He said jovially.

"All this looks like a big joke to you. You know my family is knee deep in debts and I was their only hope and now we have nowhere to go. What do you know about hunger and need, you arrogant bastard." 

"My my, what a temper you have, Ronnie."Blaise drawled winking at me.

"Don't ever call me Ronnie."I said angrily.

"Ok..ok..peace..time out." Blaise replied crossing his arms,"Of course I know what being perpetually hungry feels like, brother. I had been starved half of my life. Do you seriously presume I was born with silver spoon in my mouth. Not every one has luck as Draco Malfoy. I was born in a ghetto. All I knew was steady stream of men my mama married and left. Some of them were good but most of them were violent son of bitches. I was even molested by one , you heard correctly, right under the nose of my mama. I was forced into hustling by one of them. The only thing which had made me survive is my body. And look at me, even after seven years, it is still my only means of livelihood. This heart to heart talk is not my thing but you seem like a nice guy. Heck, you remind me of young me, innocent with stars in my eyes. So let me give you a little advice, fag, stay and do something worthwhile rather than running away like a coward. Do it for your bloody family. Have a little faith in yourself. Try atleast before giving up." 

"What should I do? I do not know anything about this world and you people. I feel like a circus animal."I said dejectedly.

"Watch and learn, boy. You are not stupid." 

Watch and learn. I have still not forgotten the best advice anybody had ever given to me. In some ways Blaise was first real teacher I ever had. I learned everything about this job by observing him and he was damn good. The way he gave somebody just a perfunctory glance and the poor guy would pledge your everything to him. He effused sensuality with every postures or even a tilt of his head and most importantly he knew his charm and his effect on people. I have seen men or women begging on their feet declaring their love to him and he hardly broke a sweat. The insecurities of his childhood and various psychological traumas he had faced in his life had made completely distrustful of people. Being used by his family he loved so much , he learned only to use people . He never learned how to love and care. He was the life of the party. As soon as he entered, spotlight spontaneously turned to him and he enticed , played, enjoyed and hunted for his poor unsuspecting victims like a siren and I watched enthralled at this game of seduction. I met him again after many years. He had grown as a vintage wine but now his bevy of admirers had dropped down to only one, Theodre Nott who had always been devoted to him. Maybe he finally found love at last or may be he settled for life of security, I could not discern but Blaise Zabini in his prime was something else.

"So what have you decided farm boy. Running away or taking your chances."Blaise smirked.

The words of Blaise had actually made sense to me. I had dreamt of this world and now when I was here, I could not turn my back to it and most importantly my brothers would never make me forget my cowardly action and then I had to live my whole life being ridiculed for it. So whether it was fear of my brothers or the charms of new life, I decided to stay here thinking that it was only temporary and I should make the most out of it. 

"I think you are correct. I should stay for a while."

"Now you are making some sense, farm boy. Let's celebrate to that. Why do not we make your debut at Dumbledore's party."Blaise boisterously patted my back. 

"What is Dumbledore's party?" I asked curiously. 

"Well old Albus Dumbledore is a freaking old fairy with so much wealth in his hands that he had made it his life mission to squander it away by hosting the most lavish parties. He is godmother of all us fags. The Who's who of the world attend his soirees . There is free champagne, finger licking food, free sex and hedonism everywhere kinda like ancient Roman orgies. Believe me when I say it is the most spectacular thing you would ever see." 

"How does this Dumbledore guy has so much money to waste?" I asked curiously. I was intrigued by Blaise's description. The best party I ever went to was our village annual harvest festival with free beers and stupid dances. 

"He is, dear Ronnie, what is described here as an old wealth. I mean he has inherited his bottomless pit of money from his forefathers. There are many such families out here. Notts, Potters, Blacks and Greengrasses. They have old mansions, large estate , big gardens and fucking silver ware as a cutlery, boy. Remember the phrase silver spoon, rings a bell doesn't it and on other side there are Malfoy & Snape, McMillans, Parkinsons, they are new money. They have big businesses including clothes, oils, hotels, cars whatever. And we are indispensable to both." 

"What does that mean?" 

"This mean that Dumbledore needs us because we handsome young men add glamour to his parties. We are always invited to his spectacles. And Malfoy and others..it is part of business. We help them sell their goods. So Ronnie boy, you are going to be a star soon." 

I had laughed at Blaise's declaration outright. Me a star..it was ridiculous to even think about it. Though my interest was piqued by the details of Dumbledore's parties. I could imagine beautiful interesting people in all their elegance discussing art, music or politics and having a great time and maybe one day I hoped, they would look at me as one of them not as an awkward farm boy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New year wishes to every one.. I am starting new year with fresh chapter and hope to write new stories..


	4. The miracle

Chapter 4

What is life but a slow learning process. As we are born, we learn to walk, we learn alphabets, form sentences, start recognising people, learn to differentiate family from strangers then form friendship with strangers. Each day we learn something new and unique and also each day we forget something old. Those initial days of my time with agency are now like a blur to me. They passed like a whirlwind and I was drawn into cesspools of endless training of how to walk,pose, eat, talk or even how to stand still. I was young and eager and as Blaise said with 'stars in my eyes'. I tried to imbibe everything. It was as if old me was getting demolished brick by brick and someone new was taking its place. The gangly lad which I once were was now getting more comfortable with my body. Everything was new and exciting and I used to get so tired by the night that I did not even had time to miss Neville or my family.

Dean was only friend I made. Though Blaise and I were roommates and got along amicably enough, I felt he was more like a mentor and a guide. And truthfully, most sought after model, Blaise Zabini, had no time for a rookie like me. He even used to go abroad for shoots, travelled in first class and stayed in luxury hotels which was source of envy among other guys at the agency but at that time he was at the zenith of his career and he was too big and important to bother about petty jealousies. He sometimes got me presents from this foreign trips and I used to cherish them as some kind of treasure. Rest of the other guys never got along with me. Initially I was way below their standards and after when Blaise kinda adopted me under his folds, they became intensely envious. But I never cared because I had Dean Thomas,who was more of an artist than a model.

Dean and me shared same history- pressures of family and lack of money. His dream was to draw cartoons for newspapers and I think he had talent for it too. But salary was mere peanuts.At that time, what we did professionally, the modelling thing, was not regarded with respect and sometimes people used to think of us as expensive hustlers. I was shocked and furious when I first heard a man call me a whore but Dean remained unfazed. There was nothing in the world which used to disarm him except Seamus may be. He was cool and charming, always ready with his dazzling smile. He was quite popular but never tried to covert other people's assignments. He never bitched about anyone and was always thorough professional. I had never heard anyone complaining about Dean Thomas. His only weakness was love. He was hopelessly in love with Seamus Finnigan.

Watching Dean and Seamus together was a treat. They fitted into each other so seamlessly. The light in their eyes when they looked at each other, their secret smiles and easy camaraderie and subtle intimate touches were all evidences of what they shared. Sometimes I think, this is what love should be like, easy and relatable. No great passion, no pangs of unrequitedness, no insecurities, jealousies or insane possessiveness only two people enjoying a life together. Seamus was complete yin to Dean's yang. He was loud, obnoxious to a certain degree with his sailor mouth and lewd comments always at tip of his tongue but he worshipped the ground Dean walked. Dean grounded him and he made Dean laugh. They could make even the most satisfied man feel lonely just by simple gesture of holding hands. They even made me doubt what I had with Neville.I had once loved Neville with my whole heart but now he was slowing fading into the background. The glitter of my new life was making me forget what we both shared. I deluded myself in to thinking that may be Neville and me were never meant to be together otherwise I would never have left. The truth was I was missing Neville less and less and even though I hated myself for it, I was completely bewitched and enamoured by my new life.

My day started with exercise regimen which I enjoyed being outdoor type of boy all my life. Then, we were served healthy breakfast to watch our weight. The idea was funny to me because I had never gained a single stone despite my Mum's delicious food. I was then trained how to look at camera and be natural. I remembered being so green the first time that everybody had laughed but I was determined not to let this opportunity go. What was the probability of a guy like me getting this chance one in thousands I guess. I had my pictures taken before and with the time I realised I was good at it. The only part of job I hated was trying on clothes. Frankly speaking, how do I who had worn only hands me down clothes of my brothers, know what looked good on me thankfully the agency had a lot of good tailors who took pity on me and helped me decide. Pucey was finally getting happy at my rapid learning curve though he had not forgotten me for Malfoy blunder. He had stopped ignoring me and giving me cold shoulder whenever we crossed paths.

In spite of my dedication to new job, the feeling that was I not worth it used to gnaw at my heart. Its like one of the choir boys was suddenly asked to lead a song. I could never really believe that someone found me good looking enough to put me out there. Even after wearing all the expensive and fashionable clothes, when I looked at the mirror, I saw the same gangly clumsy me. My low self esteem and poor opinion regarding me never changed. Even now after so many years and worldly experiences, I still identify myself as as naive farm boy who accidentally wondered into different world through a rabbit hole.

Even though I suffered from inferiority complex, I learned to blend in with the crowd. Most of the time I tried to emulate Blaise. From the way he swaggered with seductive tilt of hips, the way he laughed or what he ate or drank, I imitated it all. I learned how to order a coffee, recognise good wine or texture of fabrics. I was always fast learner when I loved what I was doing. If my surly village headmaster was as interesting as Blaise Zabini, maybe I would not have skipped school or got rapped on knuckles or wrote I am a dunce hundred times on the blackboard. It was not all fun too. I still had to tolerate barbs from likes of Zach and Corner. They had made it their life mission to make my life hell by mocking me at every step I took but they did not know I had really thick skin courtesy my big bully brothers Nothing they did was worse than what my brothers had already done to me. I was ready and raring to go . All I needed was a break.

The fiasco with Draco Malfoy had labelled me as someone with bad luck. Despite all my effort to learn every rope of this business ,I was still considered as jinx in the agency. The rumours of Malfoy rejecting me had travelled far and wide and most importantly I looked different. At that time, natural blondes with blue eyes and fair unblemished porcelain skin were epitome of perfect male beauty. I was compete anathema to it, a redhead with freckles. Nobody was willing to take a chance with me. I was too different and peculiar. I was getting sick and tired of people rejecting me every time they looked at me. I had laboured hard and was trying my best but I was still jobless. And then as they say, a miracle happened. Yeah, I know it sounds cliched now but I sincerely believed that it was a gift from heaven at that point of my life.

I was told by Cedric that it was Severus Snape who had liked my photos and proposed that I modelled for their latest clothing lines. He had gone overseas for some business expansion when my altercation with Draco Malfoy happened and now he was back in town and willing to meet me in person. I can still feel the shivers of anticipation and hope before that meeting. Severus Snape had reputation of being extremely dour and rude. He was man of few words and being a perfectionist, he did not tolerate fools or sloppiness . He was hard working man and a real professional.

It was with baited breath, I stood outside his office along with Pucey. His office looked so minimalist in contrast with opulence of the building. Pucey too was fidgeting in his chair. It was make or break situation for both of us. I could literally feel my heart jumping against my chest. My insides were in turmoil as we were lead inside his chambers.

Severus Snape seemed to have aversion to bright colours. His chamber was as austere as the man himself. He was severe looking man with hawk like eyes, long crooked nose and eyes so black that you could not differentiate pupils from it. What struck me most was the intensity of his gaze as if he had ability to hear your thoughts and deep timbre of his voice.

"Mr Snape. What a pleasure meeting you in person, Sir.", Pucey was leaving no stones unturned in fawning all over Snape.

"Let's get straight to business , Mr Pucey. My eyes and brain are saturated with blond dolls you parade around as models. I had shown some interest in some photos that were sent to my company but Draco had told me that the model was ill mannered and a rookie. Is that the truth?" Snape was not the one given to small talk. He always meant business.

"That was a little misunderstanding, Sir. We apologise profusely for it. Ronald here is very sweet guy. He had promised that he would behave with proper etiquette in future. You would not be disappointed in us, Sir. We believe in absolute professionalism." Pucey was simpering.

"Really, I was led to believe that the boy was already trained model. I do not tolerate liars as much as I do not tolerate dunces."Snape snapped.

The last sentence was made with Severus' gaze in my direction and I flushed with shame. I thought that there was no way this stern man would give me any chance. It was now or never. "I am extremely sorry Sir, for insulting Mr Malfoy. It was not my intention. I was new to the city and its ways, Sir. I am willing to learn and I am a quick learner."

"Why should I trust my business on a rookie, inexperienced whelp like you?" Snape sneered.

"Because you chose me. There must have been something in my photos you saw that piqued your curiosity and you deemed me worthy enough to have private interview considering your busy schedule and other important matters. Everybody is rookie at one time of their life including you, Sir. All I want is a chance to prove to you and to myself that I can do it." I literally begged the man to show some charity to me. By then I was desperate. The daily rejections was starting to break my spirit and my only hope was the cold and indifferent man sitting before me.

I could see Pucey gulping like a goldfish at the end of my tirade. I was shaking from head to toe and had already started retreating towards door and then the most extra ordinary thing happened. Usually the turning point of one 's life is dramatic meeting or losing somebody, discovering something, or getting new job or having epiphany. For me it was a simple word monosyllable said in deep baritone voice by a man who always remained a puzzle to me. "Okay".

That was the word Snape uttered without any concern. For him, it meant nothing may be. But that word opened new vistas for me. I can still see look of total disbelief on Pucey's face when Snape said "okay". He was flabbergasted and so was me. I pinched myself hard to ascertain whether it was one of the craziest dream I was having but the pain turned into greatest pleasure.

"Don't gape at me like a fool and leave my office immediately. The rest of the details would be sent to you shortly by my staff." Severus Snape dismissed us. I could never understand why the most misanthropic man I ever knew took a chance on me. Years later I recalled asking Snape why he selected me and he replied in his characteristic sarcasm, I did not find anyone better. Some men never change.

Despite all my efforts, I still can not remember how I spent next few days. I was lost in the haze of euphoria and wonder. Dean was only one who seemed genuinely delighted. Even Blaise seemed slightly envious of me. But it were the faces of Zacharis and Michael which gave me immense enjoyment and yeah, payback is a bitch. They looked as if the sky had fallen or pigs had started to fly. Nobody had ever imagined that I would land the most prestigious and talked about deal of the town that too after disastrous encounter with high and mighty Draco Malfoy. But miracles do occur and the impossible had happened. I was soon to start next phase of my journey and god be my witness, I could not wait enough to leap into it. I was ready to take my flight into new skies and soar high.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now the story is picking up, may be we will meet Harry in next chapter... I will update the new chapter before the end of the week.


	5. The party and an encounter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer : I know nothing about modelling and how fashion industry works. Every thing depicted in this story is pure imagination.

Chapter 5

Everybody regard the past with a tinge of nostalgia and happiness. We always say "those were the days". Maybe we remember only the good and selectively erase the bad from memory but with rose tinted glasses of nostalgia past looks very appealing. As our bodies wither and start decaying, what is left are the memories when we were young and virile. When we had energy to party all night and still be roaring to go next day. When this wrinkled and loose skin bloomed like fresh petals, when these creaky bones lifted weights and expectations of world and when our dwindling eyesight used to shine like orbs in the sky. As I stand in front of mirror inspecting myself, my mind invariably travels back to the time when I had my first professional shoot. I was just nineteen with spring on my steps. I was going to earn money while wearing fabulous clothes and preen in front of camera, what else, could I ask for. I, who had spent a major part of the life cleaning stables knee deep in cow dung was now treated to all the silks of the world. Now doubt, the glamour of modelling life blinded me. My first assignment for Malfoy and Snape was a success and it catapulted me to the top. Overnight, before even my first shoot, I was the talk of town. My red hair, pale skin peppered with freckles and freakishly tall, lean body which were once scorned and ridiculed now were in new fashion. I was swept into this storm of stardom and I had no one to steer me safely. I guess in retrospective, I was doomed from the start.  
   
When I say those were the days, I really mean it. The businesses were blooming. There was new experimental music, proses, poems and art getting created by zealous and passionate people. It was as if a new world was taking birth overthrowing vestiges of puritans and I was ecstatic to be part of it. The people were getting bored of old concept of classic male beauty. The sun kissed golden locks ,blue eyes, white ivory skin and perfect sculpted body was now getting out of flavour. Dean with his dark chocolate skin, olive toned Blaise and yours truly were new toast of the fashion circles. Flaws and imperfection were revered. The lyrical sonnets had given way to prosaic poses without rhythm and metre. The taste of music had changed. People no longer flocked to operas and symphonies. The jazz and electronic guitar were new sound and all went crazy over it. There was booze and bohemia everywhere. The dark clouds of wars had receded into distant memory. The gays were no longer getting persecuted in back alleys and had special bars reserved for them only. Fashion was changing and I was at the right place at the right time.

Albus Dumbledore's parties are the exact metaphor of those heady days. Dumbledore parties were always talk of the town. Albus was unapologetically and flamboyantly gay with loads of money to support his lavish lifestyle. He was also biggest philanthrope known and donated substantially to museums, schools, hospitals and art galleries. He was an eccentric genius and was once a reputed educationist and head master of most respected school, Hogwarts Academy. They said that he had single handedly transformed the ways things were taught. Most of his protege were shining stars in their respective fields. After the death of his long term partner Gellert, he had given up his profession and now lived larger than life. He was supposed to be sweet on Pucey's boys and you can imagine my surprise when I saw a embossed golden envelope addressed to me saying " Let me taste a bit of ginger. Don't keep me waiting, Red."

It was old Albus who gave me my nickname, Red and somehow it stuck.

"Blazing hot Red scorched the fashion world." screamed the headlines after first photos of my professional shoot for Malfoy & Snape were published. As always Severus Snape knew the pulses of the people and I was overnight star. I was young, eager to please and with insatiable appetite for appreciation. Of course it all went to my head. Lets get back to it later and return to my first foray into Albus' soirees.

It was first time in my life, I was going somewhere fancy. I spent so many sleepless nights worrying about all the blunders I was going to make. Staring at camera wearing fabulous clothes was easy but actually going to a place where all the creme la creme of society were going to gather was mind wrecking. I was a complete mess before the party. Blaise as always found my discomfort amusing calling me Cinderella. I had grown up in a farm and did not know proper etiquettes or how to behave in high society and Blaise telling me that I was just an adornment or a show piece and I did not need to interact with others failed to calm my nerves either. And moreover, the one I was most dependant on, Dean was actually ditching me for a romantic date with Seamus. I could still not trust Zach and Mike. I begged Blaise to stay close with me there and he laughed at my face. "Red, you are acting like a virgin bride on her wedding night."

Dean had selected my clothes and I blindly trusted his judgement. I was wearing greenish blue silk shirt with black leather trousers. "They enhance two of your assets, Ron. Your eyes and your ass." Personally I found my clothes to be a little brazen but Dean had insisted on it and I bowed down to his far superior taste in these matters.

Pucey had arranged the car for us and I was surprised to see girls in the small group which had collected. Blaise smirked, "His agency covers both female and male models, sweetie. Don't you worry, you will be giving all the girls very stiff competition for men's attention with that delectable ass of yours."

I was introduced to Cho Chang, dainty asian beauty and Fleur Delacour, breathtakingly gorgeous French girl that my jaws dropped. Angelina Johnson was another model with short cropped hair and tomboyish androgynous features. All the girls exuded charisma, exuberance and oodles of self confidence. They smoked and flirted and looked as if they did not care a damn. They all were regulars at Dumbledore's and gossiped about the people they were going to meet. Apparently the party was thrown in the honour of Albus's favourite protege, Harry Potter who had returned home after travelling all around the world. Harry Potter according to Blaise belonged to old wealth. His parents along with Sirius Black, another heir to aristocratic family were notorious in their youth for their boisterous and rakish ways. They had died in riding accident when Harry was three. Sirius Black had fled the country in guilt and despair leaving Harry to be brought up by his aunt Minerva Mcgonagall.. He was an exceptional student and brilliant artist and apparently" a nomad". Anyway his first set of paintings were smashing success and Dumbledore needed the reason to celebrate.

Another frequent fodder of gossip was emergence of one Hermione Granger. All the girls talked about her as if she were some sort of hero. She was closest friend of recluse Potter and edited a newspaper with unorthodox and radical leanings. She believed in equality and woman's rights and strongly disapproved of Dumbledore hedonistic lifestyle but still attended his parties out of respect as she was among his closest students. There were rumours of her being a bit sapphic in her inclinations and all the girls giggled at the suggestion and teased Angelina about it.

I was completely out of depth in this crowd. As a little boy, I had imagined what the world outside would be like but as I stepped inside the gigantic gates of what look like a castle, it really felt like a dream coming true. As gay as it may sound, at that moment I was really like a Cinderella. The path from gates to actual building was paved with greyish stones and large verdant gardens surrounded the house. There was a big pond at the front and statue of a nude man as a water fountain and water dripping to my shock from the enormous cock of the statue.

There was long line of tailored servants waiting to welcome you with a smile and drink. As the gates to the castle like house opened, all I could see was colours. It looked like the insides of house had exploded with colours. There were banners, multihued ribbons and bright sparkling lights everywhere my eyes could reach. After adjusting to the lights and colours, I marvelled at the ornate furnitures, enormous chandeliers hanging from the ceiling reaching up to the floor. The hall was so huge and could easily accommodate two times my village market. One one side of hall, musicians were playing with abandon and gusto and a female singer was belting out a seductive song in her dulcet tones. The guests were dressed in finery. Women were bedecked with jewellery and smell of exotic perfume filled up the air. Men were in the trendiest waist coats and trousers. Everybody was busy mingling and having a great time. In centre of it was a large portly man with white flowing beard and twinkling blue eyes. He was wearing a purple robe like dress. Even someone like me who had never met the man had no problem in recognising that the man could be no other than Albus Dumbledore. On seeing us, he beamed a mischievous smile and shouted, "Ladies and Gentlemen, Pucey's boys and girls have arrived. Blaise darling, have you gained a bit weight. Fleur as enticing as ever. Angelina, Hermione was asking about you , methinks. And who is this vision in blue." He was winking at me and I turned red as lobster. The man had toppled me like a tornado and even my ears were turning red. I put out my hand and politely introduced myself, " I am Ron Weasley, Mr Dumbledore. It is my greatest pleasure to meet you in person. Thank you for the invite, Sir."

"Don't worry, Red, pleasure is all mine. I am always at your beck and call."Dumbledore had taken my hands and was showing no intention to let it go.

I could not believe my ears that an eighty year old man was flirting with me so shamelessly. It did not even felt creepy or uncomfortable. I became the fan of Albus Dumbledore the moment I met him. He was life of the party. He radiated intelligence, naughtiness, love and so much warmth that people flocked around him like moth to the flame. He could be flirtatious lech in one second and cool caring grandpa in another making you wonder which of his persona was true.

"Such a polite good boy. Has Blaise not corrupted you with his wild ways yet."Albus said finally leaving hold of my hands and embraced Blaise with full bear hug.

"I try, Albus. You know I try my best to lead innocents astray."Blaise drawled returning the warmth.

"Not this one, Blaise. He look like a whiff of fresh air. Who found him, Certainly not you, Pucey?" Albus arched his eyebrow and questioned Pucey.

"Mr Snape, Sir." Pucey replied politely.

"Really. Well, Severus was always a big romantic under his hard exterior." Albus mused stroking his beard ," Welcome to the party, Red. Maybe you would find the one tonight."

"The one, Sir?" I asked curiously.

"Yeah boy, The one for whom your heart beats. The one who is made for you. Go find him."

I did not want to disappoint the old man by telling him that I had already found my one and he was waiting for me miles away in a obscure little village with population half of his guest list.

The party was in full swing and there were spectacular fireworks in the sky. I tried to stick close to Blaise but he disappeared with thin wiry man called Theodre Nott. I drifted around tasting sumptuous feast and drinking delicious wine marvelling at the decadent display. I wanted to memorise every experience and etch it into my heart forever so that when I return home, I could recall even the smallest detail. I was and would always be a voyeur between these people, an outsider looking into their lives like an tourist.

"Look who of all people is invited here?" drawled the voice behind me accompanied by sniggers.

I turned and saw one and only Draco Malfoy leaning against the wall with drink in his hand surrounded by his set of admirers.

"Well..well.. The Red himself. If only Uncle Sev did not have fetish for redheads.. What would the hot Red be doing.. Do you know? I bet you do not. He would be deep in shit working on a farm. So how does it feel like hobnobbing with people whose shoes you used to lick, farm boy?"

The mere sight of that man made my blood boil with anger. I replied back , " I would prefer working in shit than hobnobbing with likes of you."

The way Draco eyes twitched with anger made my day as I smirked and walked past him.

"You will learn your place one day, farm boy. Mark my words. And that would be you kneeling before me like a whore you are."

I did not pay any heed to Draco's threats and spent rest of the party avoiding him. Even his obnoxious presence had not dampened my spirits and interest in the party. I wanted to come here so badly and now that I was here , I was fully determined to enjoy this time while it lasts. To distance myself away from Malfoy's gang, I entered a room with walls full of paintings. I looked around curiously. There were old family portraits of Dumbledore's clan. The women dressed in full elegance and men looking regal in uniforms. Further down the wall, there were paintings of beautiful sceneries. Snow capped mountains, crystal blue lakes and orange coloured leaves and red deserts. I wondered whether such awe inspiring places really existed. And then there was this painting of an old lady reading by the lamp. She seemed so immersed in what she was reading with her fingers ready to turn the next page. Finally at the end of the room, I was struck by this painting of a nude man sleeping on the bed .The sheets were bunched around his sharp hipbones revealing his smooth muscled torso and flat abdomen begging to be licked. The early rays of sun were casting long shadows over his face . The mussed up hair and a bite on the neck seemed to indicate the night well spent. Suddenly I felt like a pervert watching an intimate moment of this undeniably beautiful man. I longed to touch straight lines of the man's body. He was painted so beautifully that the painter must have been madly in love with the naked man in the canvas.

"Just stand where you are and do not move.."

I was startled by the voice behind me. A man was standing by the door and he was scribbling something furiously in his notebook and staring at me. His jet black hair were messy with streaks of red colour and his clothes looked expensive but dishevelled. There was smudge of red paint on his forehead and also on his glasses. The man was looking at me with such an intense gaze that I found myself hypnotised by his green eyes.


	6. Harry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally this chapter was part of previous one but I had to split it in two as it was getting lengthy. Therefore it is a little short and then I got delayed in updating it as I was busy celebrating festival of kites ...Believe me thousands of colourful kites in the sky.it is the most beautiful thing. Enjoy.

Chapter 6 

There are some moments in your life that are so magical that your skin still tingles when you relive them in your memories. My first encounter with Harry Potter is one of my most treasured memories which I will always cherish no matter the pain and heartbreak which followed afterwards. In fact before I met him, I was already in love with his paintings even though I was completely clueless about art. There was always a part of his soul lurking behind his paintings. Harry always gave a piece of himself in every canvas he painted. He was oblivious to world when he had brush and palette in his hands. He never knew the magic of his green eyes. They always reminded me of fields where me and my brothers used to play cricket in summer or Neville's greenhouse where we spent hours lying together barely speaking to each other. Even now when I am watching the drops of dew sparkling on a leaf blade, my mind still wanders back to Albus's house when I met him for the first time. The room I had wandered into while escaping Draco Malfoy was the private study of Albus Dumbledore where he kept his favourite paintings of Harry. 

"Just stand where you are and do not move.." 

Those were the first words he ever spoke to me. I did not know how to react and the way he was staring at me was making me a tad uncomfortable. I wanted to discreetly retreat back to the main hall but his arresting eyes just held me to where I stood. I was starting to fidget nervously while he continued to scribble in his pad simultaneously looking at me.I tried to look over what he was drawing.. He showed extreme irritation at my change of posture. He advanced towards me backing me against the wall. He tilted my head to left and said, "Just stay like this."

My skin burned at his touch. There was something about him which was scaring me. I was never noticed this intensely by any one. I replied timidly,"I am sorry. I do not know you. I need to go." The man was little off his head, it seemed.

"What?",he said with complete disbelief in his tone, " Can't you stand still for god's sake."

Oh, Great. Another twin of Malfoy with his precious head full of ego. I said defensively, "I was invited to the party by Mr Dumbledore. Sorry if I did not know the names of hundred odd people who were also invited." 

The man was still looking at me unblinkingly. I wanted to run away as fast as I could. The man was filling my brain with ideas I did not have nerves to follow. He was standing a breath away from me. From this close, I could see his plump pink lips and his long feminine fingers. To this day, Harry's hands are the most beautiful thing I have seen. I remember the longing to be caressed by them when I first noticed them. Everything about the man standing before me was intoxicating. I was under the spell of his green eyes when the voice of Albus Dumbledore breached the magic in the air. 

"Harry my boy, what are you doing in here? Everybody is looking for the guest of honour. Oh, I see, you have met Ronald. Were you looking at his paintings, Ronald? Don't you just fall in love with each one of them. He is a genius, my boy Harry." 

Even my thick brain could make out now that the man standing before me was the same artist I was thinking about few minutes ago. Harry Potter, protege of Dumbledore, for whom this party was held. Was he sketching me just now. The thought filled me with exhilaration and joy.

Harry was blushing slightly at the compliments of Albus and messing up his already tousled hair. The pink tinge of his cheeks, red smudge of paint on his forehead and his bottle green eyes, he looked so adorable and as fascinating as the things he painted. 

"Which ones do you like, boy?", I was busy staring at Harry to notice the question Albus was asking me. And he coughed discreetly to draw my attention. 

I stammered my reply, " Are all the paintings drawn by single artist".

"No, not at all. Which are your favourite ones?"Albus asked curiously. 

"The lady reading by the lamp." I replied softly. Somehow the wrinkles around old lady's eyes had reminded me acutely of my Mum. 

My answer seemed to interest Harry as he looked up sharply at me but said nothing. 

"The painting of Minerva.. excellent choice. She is Harry's aunt and my closest friend. Very formidable lady. I am still a bit afraid of her." Albus joked with exaggerated gesture. 

It was hard not to fall in love with Albus. He was a genial grandfather I never had. 

"She has a kind face. Kind of reminds me of my Mum."I blurted out and immediately went red in face.

My slip of tongue seemed to amuse Albus and he smiled at me with twinkling eyes, " Not very kind when she is angry, right, Harry." 

"She worries about us, Albus and you know why." Harry replied cryptically. 

There was a moment of silence in the room disturbed by the entry of another man. Guess, the surprises of the party would not end as the person who entered was the semi nude man of the painting. He was even more handsome and dazzling in person. Tall,well built, athletic, commanding and gorgeous, he was meant to be captured in a painting. He went directly to Harry and took him in his arms whispering, "Where were you, Harry. I have been looking everywhere for you." 

I felt a sharp pang in my chest looking at those two. I felt lonely and outsider in that room intruding upon the private moment of those two obvious lovers.

"Nice to meet you too, Oliver." Dumbledore interrupted the pair.

"Yeah, Albus, always a pleasure, old man." Oliver retorted and then looking at me winked back to Albus, "cradle snatching now, you geezer." 

I was embarrassed by lewd suggestive tone of this Oliver guy. My ears had turned red and I was resembling a ripe tomato. Harry was still staring at me, unfazed. I wished he would just blink and let me go. 

"Oh, I am not the one for Ronald here. I think he has found his one." Albus remarked jovially at me with look of mischief in his blue eyes.

"Stop harassing poor guy, Albus." Oliver admonished Albus like a child, " Hiya there, man. I am Oliver Wood." 

I shook his hands solemnly. I had heard his name somewhere. I could not recall when. 

"Oliver is tennis champ, Ronald." Albus explained.

"Current world number one in ranking, Albus." Oliver preened. 

"He is always this modest, our Oliver." Albus joked.

I wondered when God was creating this world, was he partial to particular set of people. Harry, Draco, Oliver not only they were drop dead gorgeous and rich, they were high achievers and talented too. What fancy place have I landed myself into. Suddenly I began to miss my old ordinary life and my plain and plump Neville. I needed to go away from them. I felt that I would never receive any happiness from this new world. I would never belong. Among all the pomp and grandeur, I felt like I was invisible though I was physically here. I excused myself from them and quietly left the room but I could still feel those green eyes boring at my back.

Party was in full swing when I got out. Blaise was completely wasted and dancing with abandon. He dragged me towards him and we swayed to the pulsating music together. I felt a special kinship with him. 

"How are you feeling, Ronnie. Did the party meet your starry eyed expectations, virgin."Blaise whispered in my ear. 

Yes. The party exceeded my expectations.The decadent display of affluence swept me off my feet. I was even flattered by hungry gazes at my body gyrating to music and even warded off lewd proposals from lecherous men or even women. I felt like I was a tiny wave in this ocean of fun and frolic and I absorbed myself completely in it. So what I would never belong. I did not care. I was here and it was only thing that mattered. 

I was the only one who went home alone that night. Every one I knew had hooked up with someone else at the party. May be I was a bit old fashioned or may be I did not want to cheat on Neville who was still technically my boy friend. We had not broken up. May be I was scared to sleep with a stranger. Only sexual experience I had were with one boy and a girl and believe me Neville and I had done everything except real act itself. We were saving it for a special day which unfortunately never came. Or may be the real reason was that the one person I would have liked to go home with left the party in the arms of another.

I dreamt of a wooden cottage with a blue lake nearby that night. I dreamt of waking up next to Harry. I dreamt of tousling his dark mop of hair and kissing his pink lips. I dreamt of him lying on top of me and touching me in a way I had never been before. I woke up with a hard on first time after so many years. I had felt some deep connection with that enigmatic green eyed man. Never in my life, I had this electric like attraction to any one. My skin was still tingling from his touch. I wanted to be painted by him. I wanted his eyes on me all the time and I had hardly spoken less than two sentences to him. In the words of my brothers, I was royally screwed.


	7. The girls

Chapter Seven

Time flies fast when you are having best phase of your life. It had been almost a year since I had first set foot in this new world. It felt so good when I sent my very first salary to the family. It reassured me that I was worth something to them. I could imagine the excitement and happiness on their faces on receiving the money. I also sent a bonsai as a little gift to Neville. Neville never wrote back to me . It was as if he knew what we had was just a folly of childhood, a passing fancy. I was too immersed in my new life to be hurt by his non response. My family, though, wrote me elaborate letters describing their day to day activities in excruciating details. I learnt about things as mundane as Mum's gout problem to exciting things like Charlie's new girl friend, Fred's ankle injury and Ginny's new suitor. My job hardly gave me time to rest but in the darkness of lonely nights, those letters were my only companion, connecting me with the people whom I loved and missed so much.

Modelling was a cut throat job. Male models were not much popular. So we had less assignments and it lead to more back stabbing and fights. Everything was about networking. You had to make your face visible to make it sell. You had to take good care of your body, skin or hair. You could not afford to wear shabby clothes. You had to be presentable and stylish even when somebody woke you from the sleep at the middle of night. The work pressure was enormous and there was no respect and once you were sucked into it, there was no way out. Of course, it had its perks. You were cynosure of everybody's eyes, you got to wear high fashion clothes and money was good. People desired your company in their parties. You added glamour to them. You were treated as a king wherever you went. I remember never having paid for any drink. Everything ugly- insecurities, depression, drugs habits was swept under the red carpet, all people saw was a perfect pout and coif of hair.

Dean always told me to never change. He used to say that he never seen someone as innocent as me in this profession that he was scared of me losing my way in maze of corruption and cynicism. He was planning to leave modelling forever. Seamus had recently opened his own bar with the help of Dean and it was success. The bar was open to all and had great booze and music. Almost every young hipster in the city flocked to their place. On Saturdays, it was a male only night and every week a new band used to perform there. It was a riot. I remember waking up in countless Sunday mornings with worst hang overs. As their bar grew in popularity, Dean finally quitted modelling. It was a big personal blow to me. Suddenly, I felt orphaned and lonely. I had not pursued any relationship so far. Seamus used to joke, "Ronnie, me goin' to find a fella for you, soon. With an ass like this, please don't die a virgin."

Though I used to laugh at him, I knew deep in my heart, I was missing a lover. Initially I thought my stay was temporary and I would go back to Neville. And then I met Harry and I could not desire anyone else. Yeah, Harry still creeped into my wet dreams. He was regular fixture in my fantasies. He was unattainable and was already in relationship with a Adonis I would never measure upto.. Harry and Oliver travelled all over the world sometimes due to Oliver's commitments otherwise due to Harry's whims and fancies. And poor besotted me, used to obsessively keep the track of their whereabouts. I know it  
sounds creepy now but for me, Harry was like a shining star in the sky that I could only gaze but never touch.

It was not that I did not have my admirers. I was the new flavour. There was this batshit crazy designer Luna Lovegood who went gaga over me. She was daring and outlandish in her fashion sense and critic lapped up her every outrageous clothing lines. She was hailed as pathbreaking by newspaper and Hermione Granger was her most ardent supporter. She was famous for her eclectic designs.I met her in a gala celebrating her new collection. She was a pint sized woman wearing Grecian gown and crown of flowers over her dirty blond long tresses. She had big glasses and was looking at me with her owl like eyes.

"Red.. Where were you all this time, sweet pie." She crooned after giving me a tight hug. Zach and Michael sniggered at my clumsy attempts to get her off me.

"Ma'am will you please stop hugging me." I requested politely. Her breast were squeezed against my chest and her hair was trickling my nose. I did not know what to do. I glared at Zach and Michael who were clearly enjoying the scene.

"What if you vanish the moment I let you go, Red." she whispered dreamily.

She must be high I suspected. I did not want to be rude to her and said, " I promise I would not go anywhere if you release me, Ma'am."

"Promise.." she asked with her big blue eyes like a child asking for a candy. I could not help smiling at her. She was completely crazy yet so endearing.

"I promise, Ma'am." I said earnestly. And she finally let me free from her tight grip but continued holding my hand.

"I know your big secret, Red." she told me mischievously. "If you want to know, I will whisper it into your ears."

I groaned in my mind. The woman was impossible. I had absolutely no idea how to get rid of her.

"I have just met you today, Ma'am. You can not seriously know any of my secret." I corrected her.

"Oh, I do, sweet pie. She tip toed on her heels and whispered, " You are the unfinished portrait." and planted a big wet kiss on my cheeks.

I looked at her incredulously. She could not be more nonsensical. But she was looking so calm and self aware. Poor girl, I thought, must have been hit on head in childhood or something.  
"You think I am crazy, don't you, sweet pie. You are so adorable. I think we should get married." She said serenely.

"What.." I spluttered.

"Not very comfortable with fairer sex. I thought you are fence sitter. It's not fair that cutie pie like you should be only exclusive to Harry." She winked at me.

Harry.. Did she know him. How did she come to know about my crush on him. Did she really mean Harry as in Harry Potter. All sort of thoughts tumbled into my head as Luna Lovegood stood before me smiling mysteriously. I cursed my pale skin and red ears as I asked, " ..you mean?..Harry.."

Her laughter was like a bumbling brook. "Who else, silly. You are his unfinished portrait."

"I don't understand." I was utterly confused by crazy woman.

"You do not need to understand everything. Just believe in destiny, love. May be even we can end up together." She flirted.

"Luna, who are you harassing now. You have to give a little speech, remember.".

A sharp voice came from the doorway and a woman emerged among the crowd. She was wearing trousers and a white crisp shirt. She had curly fizzy hair barely controlled in a tight bun. She walked so confidently as if she owned everything. I had never seen a woman so sure of herself. Female species were kind of mystery to me. I had one little sister Ginny who was rougher than me and even swore like twins. And my Mum, Bill my eldest brother who was good eight years older than me, used to cower before her when Mum was in her full elements. The only girl I knew intimately was Lavender and apart from snogging me only thing she did was talk about her looks, hair and skin which I used to tune out. We only interacted with female models during shoots and as Dean told me those girls did not date models. They did not find us interesting enough or wealthy enough. I only met what they say "fan girls". They were even scarier than Lavender squeezing my butt at every chance. And I was more interested in hard male body than soft curves of a woman but I could appreciate fairer sex. Hermione Granger was the only girl I was in awe of all my life. Even if I were completely into girls, she was way out of my league. The way she walked, the tilt of her head, intelligent brown eyes, stray curls on her face, stubborn jaw and kind pretty features, Hermione was all this and so much more. She fought for injustice in every form. She never wavered from her convictions. She denounced arranged aristocratic marriage as a kind of slavey and she was open in her sexual choices. She was unapologetic in everything she did and apparently she hated models.

"Hermione, look what I found .. Ron.. The unfinished portrait." Luna cooed and beckoned Hermione towards her.

Hermione looked at me appraisingly. Suddenly I was reminded of my village headmaster going over my algebra lessons.

"And he is a model." Luna added.

"Really.." Hermione scoffed.

I could detect contempt under his voice and it pricked my temper. "Is there a problem, Ma'am." I questioned.

"Of course not, Mister except the fact you people are reenforcing social pressure on concept of beauty." she elaborated.

"Excuse me." I replied. Her words did not make any sense to me. Since when was I sterling example of beauty?

"I meant.. You people are extolling the advantage of being beautiful and setting up impossible standards. Look at you, admired by all, basking in adoration like pompous peacocks. Do you know a writer called Flitwick.?Of course you don't.You are more popular than him and sad part is his words are more relevant than your naked pictures. Public want to imitate you. They want to look like you and have fabulous bodies like you. What about majority of us who are ordinary in our looks. Why should they feel ashamed of their looks when they have no control over it? "

I was surprised at her diatribe against models. Even Luna was staring open mouthed at her. Zach and Mike had already vanished on seeing her. She was so passionate. I liked her instantly and said, "Did you just call me pompous peacock? C'mon, Ma'am look at me. I have never been called beautiful in my entire life. Even today my Mum says that I was her ugliest baby and believe me she has seven."

"Hermione baby, let it go. My special day, remember, you promised no public speech and lectures. You are forgetting what I said before unfinished painting." Luna tried to sooth Hermione.

Something clicked inside her overactive brain and she exclaimed, " Is he the one ! Interesting. When is Harry coming back?"

"When Ollie's tournament season ends, I guess."

My heart was thumping wildly. These girls knew Harry and somehow I was connected to whatever they were talking about. Maybe Harry had noticed me too at the party. Maybe Harry wanted to make an acquaintance with me but Harry already knew me. Albus had introduced us and if he wanted, he would have called me. All I knew that I wanted to meet Harry again. So I ventured to ask, "Are you talking about Harry Potter, Ma'am? I met him briefly at Mr Albus Dumbledore's party."

"Oh..that's where you met. Well, nice meeting you, Ronald." Hermione replied as she and Luna turned back to exit.

"Wait.. Does Harry remember me?" I blurted out. Oh god, I was behaving like a starstuck teenager. I could not have been more blatant and obvious of my crush on Harry. My cheeks were on fire and I was red from head to toe.

"Of course, he remembers you, silly, after all, the portrait of yours is still incomplete. You are his first unfinished piece. You will meet him again."

Those were parting words of Luna Lovegood and her words did come true. She was a free soul, little eccentric in her ways but unexpectedly wise in advice and had a knack of saying truth under the garb of nonsense. She was the most adorable person I had ever met. She flirted shamelessly with me. I think she enjoyed embarrassing me. she threw thos countless marriage proposals at me at every opportune moments. She was great fun. She and Hermione were Antipodes ,Chalk and cheese,Oil and water, Logic and fantasy and I loved them both and even after everything that happened ,I still miss their witty banter and presence in my heart and in my life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know..it was just a filler..I needed to introduce the girls.. Now the stage is set for Harry and may be a surprise in next chapter.


	8. The surprise

Chapter eight

How can one define success? Is it measured in terms of wealth, fame, power ? What about your personal relationships? If you have got all the money in the world and everyone bows before your feet still you sleep alone in night, are you successful? Can the hollowness inside you ever be repleted with all the adulation and money. No matter how power you exert can you really buy someone's love. Then why we run chasing after these superficial things like a mirage in desert when what we really want is to wake up to the one we love.

At that time of my life I had everything I wanted, fame, fans and surprisingly even money everything except one I truly desired. After my first shoot, I became overnight star. I became the most popular model of Adrian Pucey's agency after Blaise Zabini and unlike Blaise I was punctual and professional. As they say everybody kneels before rising sun. I was pampered and indulged. I started getting invitations for high end parties, admirers sent me expensive gifts and I was even signed for international photoshoots which at that time was the pinnacle of success. I who had no expectations whatsoever was swept away by accolades and praises. So why was I still not happy? Why my eyes wandered in all these extravagant parties desperate for the glimpse of a pair of green eyes which had bewitched me? Why I scanned every invitation lists for a name of one person who had eluded me completely? Shy I listened attentively to the gossips among models for a hint of break up I was secretly praying for? Why I prayed fervently for another encounter with him every night I went to sleep?

Sometimes wishes do come true. Sometimes when you pray hard enough, the whole universe conspires to make your dream turn real. It was Luna's birthday party and I was invited with cryptic message saying there was a surprise in store for me. I was flummoxed since I knew as obsessed as I were that Harry Potter was not back in the town. But knowing Luna, surprise could be anything unpredictable or even scary. If Albus Dumbledore was king of spectacle then Luna was high priestess of absurd and crazy.

It was a masquerade party where you were supposed to wear a mask and to my shock,I was the only one who was not informed about it.The whole place was set like a fairy tale with rainbows green meadows and even unicorns painted on the walls. Only Luna could conceive a wishing well right in front of the hall. And she whispered into my ears, " use your penny to a good use, Ronald , god knows you will get what you wish." I laughed jovially at her child like enthusiasm. I knew he was not coming tonight but what's wrong in losing a penny.

The party was a success . It was surreal standing there without a mask hiding your face amidst the swarm of hooded figures. I could not help staring at the tall man in a pirate costume.The man had black slicked hair and he was wearing a white half buttoned shirt showing off his tanned muscled torso and black curly hair. He had a red cummerband on his tight black breeches enhancing his sinful long legs and firm hard ass. The man was a literally sex on legs and I could not stop ogling at his figure wondering what his face would look like. He was dancing exuberantly with a petite young woman swirling her around with grace and panache. May be he had noticed my unabashed staring because suddenly he turned around and moved towards me. "Hey you, looking at something you like."

His deep baritone felt like a whiskey . Suddenly my throat was dry and I was sweating like a pig. "Everything." I stated aloud. His deep belly laugh was as seductive as his voice. "You do not have any tact, do you, sweetheart."

My ears were red, tell tale signs of my shame and embarrassment. How was I ever going to seduce Harry when I can not even flirt properly without going red. No doubt Harry would never look at me when he had options like Mr Sex in legs here. I was getting angrier with my ineptness and replied curtly ,"I am not your sweetheart."

 "Then whose sweetheart are you?" the man continued to whisper in my ear. His deep rich voice was dark chocolate melting my insides. "None of your business." I barely answered back.

Everything about the man including his sexy pirate costume spelled danger in bold neon signs and I was scared. I was scared that if I stood there for few more minutes, I would not be able to resist the temptation standing before me and do stupid thing like snogging the man himself.

"What if I make it my business?" clearly Mr Pirate had no effect despite my coldness and shrugging him off. In fact his voice sounded more amused and I bet he was laughing silently behind his mask.

"You really have no shame, do you?" I asked as rudely as I could. I was cornered like a prey and could not help lashing out.

"Sorry..I am a pirate, you see. I am used to taking things I want." he said pointing his finger at himself and touching lightly at my lips. In spite of sexiness oozing out of every pore of the man, I needed to get way from him. I had seen so many hearts broken by likes of these handsome men and I could imagine men or women ending up like a notch on the man's bed. I was better than that. Didn't I deserve somebody who would look at me as a person not the body on the centrefold of a magazine or mannequin on display. "I am not a thing and I need to go."

I started to move away. "What about the goodbye kiss, sweetheart. Something to remember me by." God, the man was anything but insistent.

"Sorry, I do not have habit of kissing men in masks who I have just met two minutes ago...." I was interrupted by hot pressure against my lips. I gasped in surprise and the man proceeded to snog me senseless. The world was spinning around me and only thing that mattered was exquisite feel of his lips against mine. And when his hot and wet tongue entered the crevice of my mouth, everything exploded inside me and I could not help responding and desperate to touch hard lines of his body.

After what felt like eternity, the man pulled away from me leaving me breathless and wanting more. He traced the outlines of my face with gentle fingers and whispered, "Sorry sweetheart, I do have a really bad habit of kissing tall redheads with lush lips begging to be nibbled and caressed. Till next time, darling" .With that the mysterious pirate disappeared into the crowd leaving me reeling on the spot. I touched my lips which were wet and swollen still tingling from the kiss. I could not believe the nerves of the man and how quickly I unravelled before him. I prayed to God I would never meet him again but then again all your prayers are not answered.

May be this was the surprise Luna had planned for me being molested by sexy pirates. I could not help be disgusted by my treacherous body. Here I had come with hope of meeting Harry and one kiss from a stranger had me moaning like a slut. I decided to go away and lick my wounds in peace of my room and collided into the only person in the world I was not ready to meet at that time. Like me, Harry was not wearing a mask. His face was the only thing real among the crowds of intrigue and camouflage and relief and comfort which descended on me was like a warm blanket in chilly nights. Meeting Harry for the second time was just as intense and pleasurable as the first. I leaped with joy inside my heart. He was talking to Hermione when I bumped into him and then there was strange silence of few seconds or a life time, I can not remember. Hermione, bless her, saved the situation as always. She exclaimed, "Hi, Ronald, were you leaving the party."

How could I leave the party now when he was standing this close to me. Harry was looking at me curiously.

"You remember Harry, Ronald. Did n't you two meet at Albus mindless extravaganza."

"Hermione" he chided, just one word.

"Sorry, Harry, you two met at Albus 's great party. Ron is modelling for Luna's designs and she is basically driving him crazy with her usual antics. Harry here, Ron ,has just come from Bahamas. He never misses Luna's birthday. Where is she by the way? oh dear Lord, she is harassing Astoria. Let me go and rescue poor girl."

Suddenly I had lost my ability to speak and respond. My brain must have melted at this unexpected surprise.I stood there gaping like an idiot as Hermione left us alone. I had to speak something, anything. He could vanish away with the blink of my eye and I would be left waiting forever again.

"You were scribbling something when I saw you last." thank god, my mental faculties had not completely deserted me and I had even managed to form a complete and coherent sentence while my insides were pathetic mess.

"I was drawing you." four words. How pathetic was I that I was counting his every words and still can recall them.

He was looking straight into my eyes. I felt he could look directly into my heart and extract all my secret dreams about us from its inner recesses. I felt naked under him. All my weakness, flaws, imperfections left bare for him to observe and judge.

"Why" I asked. I wanted to know why he made me feel as if nothing existed beyond him.

"I do not know. I wanted to get away from the party and then I saw you standing there looking at my paintings. Light was playing on your hair turning it copper and gold. I had never seen so many shades of red in my life and then there were your blue eyes. Blue like summer skies or a calm ocean . You were completely absorbed in my paintings unconsciously wetting your lips with the tip of your tongue. That fleeting moment felt like a whiff of a perfume and I had to capture it. I felt the need to draw you but I could not complete it.You can never recreate these magical moments."

All my family and even uncles and cousins are redheads and half of them have my blue eyes but listening to Harry that day, I realised how differently an artist looks at our mundane world attempting to find beauty in dull and droll . It filled me with immense happiness that I had touched a minuscule part of him . What would it feel like to be in his arms actually touching him and giving him pleasure. I was willing to sacrifice everything to know that feeling for even a minute and die a satiated man.

"Harry, Sirius is leaving the country today, you better hurry up and meet him now you never know when his boat sails next"

Hermione was shouting from the distance and like Harry described my own magical moment was dissolving like a puff of smoke. He was retreating away from me. No, I would not let it go this time and I said the first thing that came to my idiot brain.

" Can you show me that unfinished painting, if it is convenient for you, of course."

He stopped in his tracks and looked back contemplating me with his mesmerising eyes. I thanked God that he was not wearing any mask because it was blasphemy to cover those eyes. I stood there my palms sweating, heart thumping to my throat and stomach ready to throw up and he said one word,"Okay".

I think that the effect his word had on me was clearly displayed on my face as he continued to say softly, " You can come tomorrow at my place."

I stayed there rooted to that place playing his words over and over in my mind. He wanted to meet me. He had invited me to his house. What a day it had been. Really a beautiful surprise. I closed my eyes and relived it again..seeing Harry again but the image of that passionate kiss with a complete stranger creeped before me. I buried it deep inside my heart and willed myself to pretend that never happened. I wanted to just curl myself in the bed and wait for tomorrow to come. I was aware of every second passing in big mantle piece clock. Months ago, I had knocked on the doors of the world I had always dreamt about but it was only during that night in my bed waiting so hard for time to pass, I felt a little window had been opened for me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I have taken my own sweet time for Ron to meet Harry again. I hope I didn't disappoint.. Next chapter is only Ron and Harry ..coming soon.


	9. Meeting Harry again

Chapter nine

Giddy. Giddy was the emotion or my state of consciousness as I entered inside the iron gates of Potter mansion. It was a beautiful majestic building though not overbearing and opulent as Albus Dumbledore's abode but still it was nothing to be scoffed at. Old money, I remembered Blaise's words. I wondered how much history this building was witness to. It was here inside this giant windows and doors, Harry had spent his childhood, orphaned and alone. The mansion was made of grey stones and to my eyes looked quite desolate and melancholic. And there in the center of the garden below a big oak tree sat Harry, drawing something in his little notebook. He looked achingly young and lonely like the house he lived in and I controlled my intense desire to give him one of my Mama's patented bear hug. He was so engrossed in his sketch that he did not look up even when I was standing just a foot away from him.I dared not disturb his reverie. I watched entranced the deft movements of charcoal pencil on a sheet of paper and realized that I could spend ages looking at him busy in his drawing and never be tired of it. How can a total and complete stranger had such a grip on my heart. It felt as if Harry had carved himself on my flesh. My rational mind or what had remained of it screamed that I was a fool to fall for a man way above my league and who already had a gorgeous boyfriend. But I was smitten and hopelessly gone. I tried to cough discreetly to catch his attention. He still was unaware of his surrounding including me. I did not want to interrupt an artist at his work so I sat down besides him and since I had barely slept the night before, I dozed off.

It was a gentle touch like a soft feather on my skin which brought me back to realm of living and soon to my dislike, the touch was gone.I moaned at the loss of that pleasant sensation I had maybe dreamt about and rubbed my eyes open to see Harry smiling at me. I had dreamt of Harry smiling like this at me so many times in past months that for a moment I was stumped whether this Harry standing before me was a figment of my imagination not.

"Are you real.." I whispered.

"I believe so since you were napping at my garden." The dream Harry replied laughing.

I was still in the place where edges of dream and reality blurs so I moved forwards and touched his hands which were soft and warm. It was not a dream then and suddenly it came in a flash to my mind that Harry had invited me today and I had napped in front of him like a fool. I panicked and blurted out ," Oh my God, I am sorry. I was here and you were drawing something. You were looking so serene that I did not want to disturb you. I did not mean to doze off but I had hardly slept last night. I was too excited to meet you."

Harry arched his one eye brow at my blabbering self and smiled, " Do you want to take our conversation inside. It's getting chilly out there."

I was gazing stupidly at his smile. His smile could thaw the arctics.

"Let's plan to melt the arctic some other time. Now just have some tea and sandwiches. I am starving" He said looking bemused at me.

To my horror and utter embarrassment , I was saying my thoughts aloud and immediately I turned red. I cursed my scrambled mess of brain and insane effect proximity of Harry was having on me. If only ground would burst open and swallow me whole. I was making such a pathetic impression. God, he would never want to see me again.

The interior of his house was as awe inducing as outside. Apparently his aunt took care of it. We sat in dining hall with beautifully carved wooden chairs and a large ornate table as Harry rang a bell and ordered tea and sandwiches. There was a bit of uncomfortable silence. I was afraid to open my mouth and put both my feet inside them again so I kept quiet and he continued glancing at me now or then with amused look in his face.

"So, you are a model. Are you new to the city?" He asked.

The genuine interest in his eyes about me melted the ice between us and I proceeded to tell him every minute details of my life before coming to the city. He was curious and wanted to know more about my family and my village. He seemed to enjoy anecdotes about my family including all the jokes and torture my brothers made me suffer. He laughed out loud when I told him about the time when my evil brothers had turned my hair blue just before my first dance with Lavender. I felt like I could go on and on. Nobody had shown any remote interest in my previous life before so I had never talked about my family to any one till now. I was labelled as a farm boy who made it big right from the start and people usually looked with contempt at my background .But sitting here with Harry in his big lonely house and and talking about my Pa, Mama, brothers and spoilt little sister, I could not make myself stop and the floodgates of all those memories and countless moments I missed so much just broke open and I felt tears brimming up in my eyes. Harry stayed stoic like my anchor and he could really understand what missing your family was like.

"I am sorry.I never realised I miss them so much."I apologised with heavy voice.

"Of course you miss them, they are your family.It must be nice to have big family." His voice sounded wistful and childlike.

"I have doubts about twins though. I sincerely believe that they are devil incarnate."

His laugh was like a stream of bubbling water or smell of first harvest or summer rains and I was in danger of getting addicted to it forever " I think it is getting late. I should better go."

"Hey, what about the painting?" he asked me quizzically.

I needed to go. I wanted to run away from him, his mossy green eyes, his sparkling laugh, his warm toasty smile and his beautiful hands. He had a lover who totally deserved him. It was even preposterous to imagine us together. I knew nothing good would come out of my impossible crush on him. I would get hurt but my treacherous heart was adamant to court disaster pending ahead. "Are you okay with me seeing it?"

"Absolutely." his single word ended my indecision and I was willing to stay near him forever if only he could ask.

I do not remember how many halls and passageways we crossed to reach the place where he had his studio. I wondered how can one live alone in a freaking gigantic house.

"I am used to solitude in fact I crave it. My best time of the day is just before dawn. When the sky is still dark with tinge of red bleeding from the edges and everything is quiet waiting for the first rays of sun to kiss them awake." He explained passionately.

I was speechless at the beauty of his words. An intense jealousy passed over me at the thought of Oliver Wood sharing this intimate moment with Harry. I could imagine them carelessly wrapped around each other as the dawn rose.

He led me to that unfinished painting. I was immediately transported back to Albus's party. I could not believe it was my face drawn on a white piece of paper. It was deja vu. I once again relived the overwhelming emotions and fascination I had felt when I had first stumbled into his art. It was kind of surreal to see those emotions coming alive through a simple painting of my face. I was completely floored by his talent.

"I can not believe, I missed something so glaring."I heard Harry's voice. It felt angry, dejected and frustrated.

"It is like looking into the mirror. I do not think you missed anything." I replied confused.

"Your freckles. How could I not miss them that day." He was petulant like a little child.

I was taken aback by his outburst. I disliked my blemished skin anyway."It's totally fine you missed them then. I hate them. I wish I were freckle free."

"No." I was surprised by his emphatic answer.

"I need to paint you again. I do not want to miss even a single one." He sulked.

His fascination with my freckles was amusing and I replied "That would be real tough because mate I get new ones every day. Blame my genetics. Redhead marrying among themselves."

"They are like watching the starry sky." He caressed my cheeks once again with his soft feathery touch which drove me crazy.Was he flirting with me or was he being his usual artist self. I could not tell because once again I was giddy..yeah..giddy with happiness.

"Why don't you stay for dinner. Hermione is also coming over." There was something in a way he was looking at me may be he wanted me too.

I asked tentatively, "What about Oliver? Is he coming too."

He was busy studying my face and said absent mindedly, "Huh. No.. No.. Ollie is not coming. Just me and Hermione."

I thanked whatever Gods were looking over me that Oliver was not going to be here but the way Harry said Ollie rankled something inside me. Harry was asking me to stay and it was only thing that mattered. He was standing close to me. I could feel his breath on my skin and smell the odour of paint and cigarette and something woodsy coming from him. If I could just take a one step more and he would be in my arms. Just one step and my dreams would come true. And then he stepped back and I felt empty and incomplete.

The dinner was almost a pleasant experience. I met Lady Minerva, Harry's aunt from his mother side. She had strict school headmaster face but kind eyes. She dotted over Harry and still reprimanded him for his long absence. Hermione came over with her usual burst of energy. Somehow among these people who I had never known a day before, I felt content and belonged. I was happy to listen to their family chatter. It reminded me of my home. They were talking about Sirius, Harry's godfather who had surprised Luna by gifting her an orangutan as birthday gift at her birthday party and Luna true to her crazy self had decided to keep it in her house much to Hermione's distress. She had named it Coco. Lady Minerva clearly disapproved of Sirius and added that age had no effect on Sirius mental faculties and he was getting worse day by day. Sirius definitely sounded like fatal combination of Fred and George. Harry never talked much. He was more of a listener and never participated in conversations voluntarily but even his silent company could never bore me.

"So, Ron, did you like the painting." Hermione asked.

"Yeah..I like all of Harry's paintings." I replied loudly and blushed to my roots.

My unbridled enthusiasm seemed to amuse her and she shared a knowing look with Lady Minerva.

I added hastily, "I saw them at Albus' house ."

"Of course, he is a very talented artist.A bit whimsical, stubborn as a mule but great." Hermione teased Harry.

"Thanks for your rare compliments, Miss Always Right Granger." Harry retorted back.

It was heartening to see them bicker like old married couple. The whole day had passed like a fantasy and I had enjoyed every single moment of it. I was reluctant to leave. I was afraid that the day like this would never happen again.

"Harry, are you finishing Ron's painting in future." Hermione questioned Harry as I took my leave. God bless her intelligent and intuitive mind. I was dying to know the answer of the question I dared not ask.

"No.I am painting the other one." Harry replied casually.

It was a second night in the row I could not sleep. I knew I would incur wrath of Pucey for my sleep deprived puffy eyes and bags under them at next day shoot. But I was floating above clouds and could hardly care. I had nearly spent full day with the object of my affections and there were whispers of promises of another day like this in future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that the snail like pace of the story make it a bit boring but I love slow building romance.i am old fashioned like that. More to come in next chapter. I need to remind again that story is unbeta ed so I am to be blamed for all the mistakes.


	10. Rumor and realisations

Chapter ten

You might think that I had become quite vain and self obsessed because I nearly spent next few days looking at the mirror at every opportunity I got and being a model, I had the luxury of practically being glued in front of it. Even Dean commented on my newly acquired mirror grazing habit. But how could I tell all those people that I wanted to see what Harry's eyes had seen. I wanted to know whether I really resembled his painting. And he wanted me to paint again.Was I worthy enough to be his model. I had seen paintings of his previous muses like Oliver. They were rich, sophisticated and gorgeous. Being a model for some clothes was one thing but posing for an artist that too Harry Potter was too much pressure. I was caught unaware the first time but this time, I was going to be fully prepared and wanted to look the best. And thanks to my good fortune, I was in glamour business where there is every trick available to hide your flaws and cover your blemishes. I know it sounds superficial now but then I was literally behaving like a debutante girl on her first official dance. I harassed make up artists to make my skin flawless and hounded dress designers to make me the best costume to highlight my features. I knew I was no match to Oliver Wood but Harry had liked my face enough to venture to draw it again and I would certainly not disappoint him. It may sound a little pathetic but what could a poor ignorant fool like me do to impress someone newspapers referred to as " tortured genius".

Of course he did not call that week. Everyday I prepped myself to look best and every night I slept with a little part of my heart broken. Even my near absentee roommate , Blaise Zabini noticed my  strange behaviour and could not help asking, "Ronnie, you in love or something?" when he saw me checking myself out in mirror for umpteenth time.

"What?" I blushed hard. "What gave you that impression."

"Nothing much except your whole face and body. I thought you had a guy back home." Blaise smirked.

"Hmm...it was not that I was going to marry him or something." I retorted back. Yeah once upon a time me and Neville definitely dreamed to get married or at least go old together with our own farm and a little garden. But I was not farm lad anymore. I was Red now. Hottest thing in modelling industry.. not my words but words of people around me. This was the world I belonged to now. A world where there were spotlights, glamour, money and exhilaration. I was high on my success. After tasting a bit of this new life, I could never go back and live happily with Neville. He would not understand me now. Nobody finds love at thirteen years of age. We two were a couple of kids promising each other stupid impossible things like children our age normally do. And what I felt for Harry was something I had never felt around Neville. He was a past now , slowly fading into a distant memory.

"Hey man, you looked serious about that guy back when you were fresh off the boat. Calm down and tell me about this new guy. Do I know him?" Blaise asked.

"May be you do,"

"Just drop a hint, Ronnie. I am desperate to know who had managed to capture your heart."

"He has a boyfriend, Blaise. I do not know what am I doing. It's like whenever I see him, I forget everything. I am such a mess around him. I know he is way above me in everything but still I imagine that one day he would be with me. I feel like a loser sometimes."

"Oh my God, Ron, this is getting serious. I mean you really like this mysterious guy. How many times have you met. Has he given you any indication that he likes you too. You are new, unexperienced and you do not know these men. They treat models like a plaything. Don't put your heart out there, man, otherwise you would be the only person who would be hurt."

"I don't know whether he likes me or not. But I know that I feel happy when I see him. My hearts feels like it would burst out with emotions when he is near me. I can not help it. He attracts me in so many ways. I have not felt something as intense as this before. It is consuming me completely. He wants to paint me. He seems interested in me and my life. What more can I ask for?"

"Paint you. Are you fucking kidding me. Oh my god, you are crushing on Harry Potter, aren't you? that poor little rich orphan boy. Even Draco Malfoy would have been better choice than that cold hearted bastard known for running away from feelings. At least Malfoy would have shown you good time and would never lie about his intentions to bed you."

"What the hell, Blaise, how can you compare Harry to that arrogant asshole. Harry is an artist.How can he run away from feelings when his paintings speak so much. He is an deeply emotional guy."

"Look at you defending your little crush. Don't come weeping to me when the great artist breaks your heart into pieces."

"What the hell you know about Harry. You have not even met him or talked to him. He is..just different..I can not describe it. I feel some invisible connection with him."

"I am sorry, Ronnie. It's just the rumour I heard that Harry does not do long term relationships. Hell, you are right , I know nothing about the man but I worry about you, Ronnie. You are not made for cruel reality of this world."

"I know what I am doing, Blaise and I am sure I am doing pretty good."

That conversation with Blaise shook me a little. How could Blaise compare Harry with Draco Malfoy. Harry with his soulful green eyes and angelic smile. Not all rich privileged people are pompous assholes like Malfoy. I just knew Harry could never be what Blaise had described to me and I would never believe all nasty rumours regarding him.

"Stop sulking like a little bitch while your lover boy is waiting for you downstairs."

"What do you mean? Is Harry here? "

"I do not know, Ronnie boy. Pucey just asked me to tell you that someone has called for you ."

I did not even wait for Blaise to complete his sentence and tore down the steps sprinting. Harry had come to meet me. Every hurtful things Blaise had said were soon going to be proven wrong.I was breathless when I reached the reception room. I took once last look at the glass door peering at myself and after combing my shaggy hair with fingers entered the room with stupid grin on my face.

But it was not Harry sitting there with Pucey but Draco bloody Malfoy. For a moment I was shocked. There was no way Draco Malfoy would even deign to come visit me whom he had declared he abhorred so much.

"Hello, Weasley. Still the same old oaf. No amount of success can change it, I guess." Draco drawled greeting me with his trademark sneer.

"Why are you even here if you can not tolerate seeing me? " I spat back. The disappointment of not meeting Harry had soon turned into abject disgust at the sight of bloody Malfoy.

"Ronald!", Pucey interjected , " Behave yourself. That's not the way to behave with Mr Malfoy. Apologise to him right now."

I flushed with anger and embarrassment. I hated to be professional in front of Malfoy but how could I forget that it was his godfather who had given me the first opportunity.

I clenched my teeth and said bitterly, "I apologise Mr Malfoy for being an oaf and now can you please excuse me, I have to go and practice being a gentleman like you."

"There is very slim chance of that happening, Weasley." Draco continued to take a rise out of me.

"Yes, as slim as you becoming a decent human being." I retorted. Such a rotten heart inside a beautiful body.

"Ron" Pucey looked as if he were having a heart attack.

"Touché, Weasley. It is rather unfortunate turn of events that your ugly mug has become the face of our clothing lines. You can see, I am dealing with this travesty as stoically as I could. Our next advertisement is going to be shot in a exotic island which we Malfoys happen to own and there is going to be huge celebratory extravaganza for our international partners. You being the so called face of our campaign are going to be there and I am forewarning you Weasley. You better be on your best charming self though it is tough to expect that from clumsy klutz like you. God, What was Severus drinking that day."

"You know Malfoy, you and your exotic island can go to hell .."

"Ronald.Enough. Mr Malfoy thank you for personally coming here and deliver such an wonderful news. Our agency is one of the foremost professional agency Sir. Our models are well trained. You will not hear a single complaint from them. I completely assure you, sir." Pucey as usual tried to salvage the situation by placating Malfoy.

"You better be, Mr Pucey. This event is very important for us. One simple mistake and you would be shutting down your so called agency and going back to your tailoring days. And as for you ,Weasley" he said giving me a look over, "You really have nerves to talk to me like that. Just don't embarrass yourself ." He scoffed at me and left the room with flourish.

"Ronald, you stupid fool. Do you want to make my wife widow and children orphans by being cause of my premature death. I swear if you pull another stunt like that, I will smack you on head. Do you even know how prestigious this campaign is and what wonders it would do to your career. Control your temper, boy", Pucey admonished me as soon as Draco left.

What could I do? Draco Malfoy had the ability to draw out my baser instincts. I wanted to choke his pretty head with my bare hands but I owed everything I was to Severus Snape so I promised Pucey that I would be on my best behaviour though I was absolutely not looking forward to the shoot on Malfoy's personal island.

"By the way, this message came for you before Mr Malfoy arrived." Pucey thrusted a paper on my hand after muttering "such a temper".

_Dear Ronald,_

_How about you and your freckles meet me tonight at my place._

_Harry._

And poof suddenly the sun started shining , the colours came back to the world, birds started chirping and I felt like floating in the clouds.

I had slicked up shaggy hair like Malfoy and was wearing an expensive suit as I knocked the gates of Potter Manor that night. Even Seamus had wolf whistled and remarked that I looked like some uppity gentleman. Of course I wanted to look elegant and graceful like those rich guys I saw in Albus's party. Malfoy's words still rang bitterly in my ears. I did not want to embarrass myself before Harry. This was my huge chance and I was all set to impress Harry.

Harry opened the doors and I gave him my dazzling smile. He looked a bit shocked at first. I congratulated myself inwardly that my new look had managed to surprise the hell out of Harry. Then he was frowning. This unnerved me a little.

"Hello, Harry." I managed to croak out.

Now Harry was looking positively furious. I could not understand what was wrong. He barked at me, "What have you done to yourself."

"I.. Nothing. You invited me tonight."

"Do you know how ridiculous you are looking right now."

It was harsh and painful like a barb of wire. Everybody at the agency had said that I was looking quite dashing and handsome and the only man for whom I did this all was staring at me like I was a hideous piece of shit. For a moment I could not understand what was happening.

"What do you mean?" I asked as tears sprang in my eyes. It hurt like hell seeing contempt in his eyes. That was not the way Harry looked. It was as if Draco Malfoy had taken Harry's place.

"I thought ..I imagined.. You would be different. The way you looked that day at the party, untouched and innocent. It was too pure to be true. Now look at you, dressed up in  finery." He said with regret in his voice.

He sounded disappointed in me as if he expected something else. The regret in his voice was more painful than contempt in his eyes. "I thought you wanted to paint me so I dressed up to look a thorough gentleman." I tried to explain. I did not know what wrong had I done but I was more than ready to rectify my mistake.

"What..yes I wanted to paint who you are not what you imitate to be. I am sorry, Ronald. I can not do it now.You need to leave."

The simple dismissal. All through the week I had prepared for this day. The spring in my steps, perpetual grin in my face, the stars in my eyes not even Blaise with his doubts and Malfoy with his hatred had ruined it. He wanted to draw who I was. Suddenly it dawned on me that Harry wanted awkward oafish clumsy me not some refined and sophisticated copy I was trying to emulate. The relief which I felt was enormous. A burden or a pressure to keep up the appearance lifted from my heart. I could be me and still be liked by Harry. The realisation kind of set me free and I said, " I am sorry,Harry.  I do not know what have I done wrong. I only wanted to look like Oliver."

Harry looked confused, "Why on the earth would you even want to look like Ollie. Don't you know how different you are from anybody here. How wonderfully unique."

Harry was the first one who gave me a sense of self worth. I was always aware of my inadequacy in the social circles I moved and people like Malfoy never made me forget my humble origins. To hide my deep seated feeling of inferiority, I wanted to behave like those people so that I could blend in with the crowd. I tried to dress like them, talk like them walk like them. It was the only way to get acceptance but Harry wanted something else . He wanted to celebrate the very thing I was ashamed of. He wanted me with all my flaws and freckles.

"You are something else,Ron. You are not jaded, cynical, vicious or entitled like  people I meet everyday. You still see this world as a child would..full of excitement  and freshness.I want that Ron which I saw at that party not this pale copy of that wonderful person." Harry said softly. He slowly took my hands in his." Do you understand me."

I had felt inexplicable attraction to Harry the moment I saw him. I pined for him like a young girl. I dreamt about him. I was stupidly infatuated to him. But at that moment when Harry held my hands and told me what he thought of me, I realised that I had fallen in love with him. I was deeply, crazily and hopelessly in love.  Was I going to remain unrequited all my life or was there a little hope  that Harry and I would actually end together. Only future held the answers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Until now everything in the story was PG rated but things are going to be steamy from next chapter..coming up in few days.


	11. Love and madness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since Valentine's Day is around the corner, dear Ronnie should also get some love too..right.

Chapter eleven

Love. It is all about love isn't it. The cradle of civilisations and root of mighty wars. The imagery of poetry, subject of great arts. The elixir of living and also the deadly curse. The heights of ecstasy, the depths of despair, the sleepless nights, the anticipation, the flutter of eyelashes, the quickening of breath,the acceleration of pulses, the jitters of nerves, the complete loss of senses , the torture of goodbye and a promise of tomorrow. Ever since my stupid heart fell for Harry real bad, I was living on a edge and days passed in a frenzy. I was modelling for his painting. I spent hours lying down on a rug half naked shivering with cold and being completely still. Being almost immobile for a stretch used to make my muscles ache in so many different ways. I remained stiff for hours afterwards but seeing those mesmerising eyes half covered in a lock of hair and long delicate fingers at work, I was even ready to turn into actual statue. Watching Harry paint was my favourite time of the day. A cigarette half burnt on his fingers, paintbrush tugged up behind ears, shirt splattered with riot of colours, streak of red on his cheeks, lower lip gnawed mercilessly by teeth, one hand unconsciously messing up already tousled hair, little creases in forehead, a hint of smile at turn of mouth, a tap of impatient feet on the wooden floor, a huff of frustration when I moved a little, he was a craftsman at work and I was humbled to be part of his world. Afterwards over a cup of tea or wine, he used to critique his work and talk about artists who had inspired him and sometimes he told me about places he had seen dense jungles of Burma, stretches of sands across Sahara or snowy slopes of Himalayas or sparkling waters of Fiji islands while I sat fascinated basking in his glory and passion and falling more and more for him.

The days without him were without colours and stretched like barren land . It felt mechanical posing before cameras with flashes of light blinding you temporarily. It was a chore giving your best smile and side profile, pouting and making love to camera like a whore. I had never been a fan of it but was rather accidentally thrown into it. The money was great but I was never comfortable at being feasted like a toy on display. The semi nude photo shoots were almost a torturous experience for me. I was a gangly kid and that feeling of being all elbows and bones never left me even when I became a popular model. I remained self conscious of my body but posing for Harry with nothing except a drape over my private parts was liberating. It actually made me love myself a little more. With Harry, I felt a kind of intimacy and a warm fuzzy feeling inside me. The crowds, the noises and chaotic atmosphere of model shoots made me crave for the silence of Harry's studio and I wanted to run away from everything to the take refuge in the sanctuary of Harry and his art.

Sometimes Luna and Hermione used to visit and seeing Harry laugh with them used to m overwhelm me with happiness. I do not know why but they had accepted me as a part of Harry's world. Even Lady Minerva ensured that I got piece of my favourite blueberry pie as a dessert when I stayed for dinner. I learned to ignore most of the Luna's shameless flirting. I became more fond of Hermione's rant against injustice of the world and quibbled with her frequently when she went about impossible beauty standards of modelling industry.

"You know Hermione they are giving employment to so many people.models, tailors, photographers, makeup artist, publicity people."

"I am not against modelling, Ron. Why can't they employ average looking or even a little fat people."

" Hey, you can not say that , they are giving someone like me a job."

"I can not believe that you still think that you are ugly even when Luna or Harry want you as their models."

"I do not know, Hermione. I still have not come to terms with it. Sometimes I think it is one big elaborate prank and I would wake up being old Ronnie again."

"Don't sell yourself short, old Ronnie. You are worth more."

"Thanks, Hermione if you say so. I wonder why you are so good to me."

" That's because you are good for him. You love him, don't you."

"What..No..What are you talking about..How do you know?"

"It's the way you look at him. It looks like he is your idol. Don't worship him, Ron, he is as human as you and me. He is not perfect."

"I can not stop it however I try, Hermione. He is everything to me. He has crawled his way inside my heart. It is both torture and joy to see him everyday."

"I do not know what to say, Ron. Harry needs someone like you in his life. Someone to anchor his wandering heart. Someone who will keep him safe. I wish it was easy."

"I know he is with somebody else. I do not mean to break them up. I swear Hermione. I will never do something like that."

"Harry and Ollie are close friends with some benefits. Nothing is serious between them. I think Harry had outgrown his teenage crush over Oliver long time ago."

"I like him a lot . I just want him to like me."

"He likes you Ron. He might not say it loud but you can notice it in subtle ways. He waits for you impatiently every day. He is twitching and fidgeting about till you enter and a calm prevails on him. You do not know what influence you have on him. He had always been restless, too quick to get bored with people and too late to trust them fully but with you, may be , he would find a peace at last. He is more relaxed ,he laughs more , talks more and even eats more. Minerva was also telling me the same thing the other day. You may be the best thing that had happened to Harry Potter in a long time."

There had been a simple rule in my life after meeting Hermione. 'Hermione is always right'. And when she said that may be Harry felt something for me too, my hopes began to shimmer again. Maybe, I had a chance with Harry however small it was, I was more than willing to take it.

Harry was unusually restless that day. He had finally completed his painting. I was not even allowed a slight peek until it was finished so I was thrilled to see what magic Harry had done with his brushes. Unfortunately shoot that day had gone too long due to one reason or other and I barely had time to change when I rushed towards Harry's house to finally see it.

The first sign that something was not right I noticed was when Harry did not open the door. Before that day whenever I knocked on our specified time of meeting, it was Harry who opened the door with his absent minded smile and cigarette dangling from his lips. I kind of looked forward to it all day. But when a servant answered the door and quietly pointed me towards Harry's studio, I felt anxious and nervous. My heart was beating too fast when I hesitantly entered the room. Harry was standing with his back towards me. In front of me was large canvas covered with a sheet of white paper. It was so quiet in the room that I could even hear my breath. I tentatively whispered, "Harry, is everything alright."

He did not reply anything and remained standing still.

I thought maybe Harry was angry at me for being late ."I am sorry that I am late. Cedric had shortage of rolls then dress guy got the wrong costume. It was bloody chaos. I had to rush from there and then Blaise had locked the room and I had forgotten to take my spare key so I went to outdoor where he was shooting and begged him to give his keys. He gave me a real hard time and finally when I got the keys. I rushed back to the room to change.."

"Ssh..it's okay" I did not even realise in my rant that he had turned around and was now standing before me. His eyes were glinting like emeralds in the dim light of the room. I was in danger of getting lost in them.

"Harry." I whispered softly.

He came a little close. One more step and I would not be able to stop myself from kissing him and this time he stepped towards me. He traced the pattern of freckles on my face with his feather light touch. I wanted more and moaned his name. He caressed my lips with his fingers. I was trembling with desire and finally after an eternity his lips were on mine.

I can write pages upon pages on what I felt when Harry kissed me for the first time. It was as gentle as petal of a rose and as scalding as piping cup of tea. Everything dissolved around me except his lips pressing against mine and his eager hands around me, touching me in ways I had never felt before. Our tongues were fighting the battle of dominance as were our hands tearing up the buttons in desperation to feel the naked skin beneath. His skin was hot under my touch and smooth like velvet. I wanted to taste every bit of it. I wanted to learn every angle of his body. I was hungry to feel him inside me. And he was there with me matching my desperation, desire and arousal equally. He pushed me down the rug where I had spent so many days dreaming of this moment when Harry would belong to me. He nibbled my ear lobes. He grazed his tongue over my jaw and neck and bit there lapping up the skin marking me. He did not know that I was already his from the time I had first met him. His hands were roaming all around my naked body mapping my skin, teasing me, fondling me. He took my nipple in his mouth and I lost all the coherence. I was a babbling mess writhing wantonly underneath his touch. I was a canvas and his fingers were painting me in colours of desire and arousal. I could not take any more of this exquisite torture. I wanted him inside me completely and cried desperately," Take me, Harry..just take me."

He took me that night and I gave him everything my virginity, my heart, my body and soul. I can not remember the details. A sharp burning pain, a feeling of being torn from insides, a jolt of electric sparks running through my body like waves, the heat pooling inside my belly, his fullness inside me making me realise how empty I was, grunts, moans and sighs, smell of sweat and sex, two bodies meeting in the rhythm, lost in time and place and finally a burst of ecstasy and after shivers of throbbing pleasure.

What I remember vividly is waking up next morning wrapped around Harry. It was early dawn, Harry's favourite time of the day. The sun rays were creeping through the windows and making Harry's skin glow like gold. His hair messier than ever were standing on the ends and his long delicate fingers were entwined with mine as I kissed each of them savouring and memorising their taste. I could feel his moist warm puffs of his breath against my neck and his long eyelashes fluttering against my cheeks. At that magical moment when night was not yet over and day had not began, I had Harry in my arms to love, to protect and to cherish. I whispered " I love you" to his oblivious sleeping self and hugged him tighter to my chest. I never wanted to let him go as I drifted back to sleep.

The wet and tingling touch in my back woke me up again. I arched under it and turned over to see Harry's hands messy with colours. He was smiling mischievously at me.

"What do you think you are doing?" I exclaimed in my sleep laden voice.

"Painting you." he smirked showing off his paint covered fingers.

"I thought you already did." I smiled at his antics.

"That was on some boring paper but now I have got a new drawing board." He waved towards me.

"It is my body, Harry."

"You are so fucking beautiful, Ron" he whispered as he trailed his fingers along my arms and forearms leaving behind the reddish green imprints on my bare skin, " So freakishly tall, such broad shoulders, a vast expanse of pale freckled skin lying unexplored. How can I resist not giving it the colours."

My body was splattered with with multitude of hues by the time Harry finished his ministrations and I was completely undone. I breathlessly moaned his name "Harry".

"Ssh.." he silenced me colouring my lips red and cheeks orange, " Look at you, Ron. You are a vision. I could stare at you forever and still discover something new. No colour in my palette can match the delicious blush of your cheeks or red of your hair or your cinnamon freckled creamy skin."

We made love again and again till my body ached and our stomachs grumbled with hunger.

People often ask me which is my most favourite Harry's painting. I always sidesteps the question because when Harry used to dip me in colours or draw insane things on my body sometimes making me look like a colourful monkey, that was my favourite of all Harry's paintings. I still yearn for those fingers and wild patterns of colour on my skin whenever I see myself naked. And when I close my eyes, I still see shining green emeralds covered by curtain of black messy hair.


	12. Lover and stranger

Chapter twelve

" Ronnie, my man, Did my ears hear correctly that you got laid finally. You are no more a blushing virgin. Free round for everybody, our lad has finally popped his cherry" Seamus shouted at everybody the moment he saw me enter the bar,to my acute embarrassment.

My frequent night outs were getting noticed by everyone at the agency. It was always difficult for me to hide my emotions and those days I was so upbeat and chirping that it was bordering on mania. Blaise had even started wearing sunglasses in the room to avoid my "too sunny disposition". 

"Got yourself a wealthy sugar daddy , you sly Weasley?" Zacharis Smith sneered after hearing Seamus' loud cheer. 

"Shut up, Zacharis." I replied playfully. Even the barbs of Zach and Corner felt amusing to me. Of course I knew about 'sugar daddies'. The shell life of male model was hardly two to five years and being used to a certain lifestyle, it was difficult for them to cope up with ordinary life after fading to obscurity. Invariably some of the models were in hunt of wealthy patrons 'so called' straight married rich men who were willing to have these models on the side. These men indulged the models in maintaining their life styles and got sexual favours as a return. I did not know how long such relationships lasted but somehow it had become a norm. 

"C'mon, Weasley. We all know there is some mysterious lover you are hiding from us. Who could have expected such cunning from country boy like you but then you are way too desperate than us . Now you secret is out. Tell us who is he?" Michael enquired. 

"Put your mind off the gutter, Michael. I don't need any sugar daddy." I replied hotly. I would rather go back to my village then be some old man's play toy. 

"Aren't you modelling for Harry Potter, Ron. How is it like?" Dean intervened to change the topic. 

"What!" Both Zach and Corner gaped at me with shock. 

"It is quite good, Dean." I said smugly winking at Dean. It was fun to watch Zach and Corner being lost for words for once. 

"Are you fucking lying to us. There is no way you would be modelling for Harry Potter." Zach finally managed to splutter. 

I wanted to declare at top of my lungs that not only was I modelling for Harry Potter but I was seeing him too. I nearly got to meet him daily. I did not know how to define what I had with him. He never said anything about relationships and I was already dreaming of us living together. It was new , raw , scary and exhilarating. I loved every moment of my time with Harry. Sometimes he left secret messages for me at the agency. We went for long walks, had cosy dinners or crazy picnics with Luna and Hermione or sometimes we just lay together besides each other under a starry night saying nothing. I enjoyed his company listening to his colourful experiences but to my surprise he also liked my rattling about the agency and the people I worked with. His laugh had become almost a drug habit for me. I had become addicted to his fingers on my skin trailing down my spine, counting my freckles, rubbing my nipples or stroking me, palming my hardness or working its magic inside me . We could not get enough off each other and literally fucked like rabbits. Even the thought of him waiting for me was enough to make me randy throughout the day. I was fourteen all over again. 

"So every body thinks that you are my sugar daddy."

We were relaxing after another mind blowing sex . I was lying on the side with one elbow propped under my hand naked as the day I was born and as usual Harry was sketching me with broad strokes with charcoal while his another hand held half burnt cigarette.

"I thought Snape was your sugar daddy." Harry said casually still concentrated on his drawing. 

"What" I exclaimed.

"Didn't you tell me that he was the one who gave you the big chance." 

Harry was smirking at me. I could feel the blush creeping up my body starting somewhere around the knees.

"May be you are right. Malfoy did tell me once that Snape had fetish for redheads." I retorted back. 

"What about Albus." He stretched besides me throwing away his sketchbook carelessly blowing rings of smoke in air from his cigarette.

I was momentarily distracted by how utterly debauched and mouthwatering he looked before registering what he had said and protesting loudly,"Eww.. Harry". 

"Maybe not sugar daddy but Albus can be your sugar grand daddy." 

He was smiling at me with his sparkling eyes and I wanted to confess on the spot that there would be nobody for me except him till my last dying breath. I had not a single iota of doubt that I loved him but I did not know what he thought about this thing between us. I used to feel inadequate in voicing my feelings for him. I was too nervous and scared to tell him how much he meant to me so I demonstrated physically my overwhelming love for him. I pulled him towards me and snogged him .The way he melted inside my arms, it was still so difficult to grasp sometimes that it was real and that it was actually Harry who was kissing me back with same fierceness and passion crying my name with his sinful mouth. 

He rolled himself above me and peppered my face with soft butterfly kisses muttering " I can not keep my hands off you. You drive me to the brink of madness. When you leave me, I sometimes remain lying there smelling your lingering scent and missing your warmth ." 

His words were maybe uttered in heat of the moment but I savoured each one of them and committed them to my memory to replay again. My name said with his hoarse voice made me hard again instantly. I was still sore from our previous lovemaking but to hell with everything I wanted him again inside me, around me and consuming me completely. "want you, Harry, want you so much ." He entered inside me in a single thrust . The sensation of him inside never ceased to amaze me. It always felt that my world had shrunk down to just him and me. Like a painter he was, he knew how to use his strokes and play with my body and leave me a sweaty, incoherent, blabbering and a needy mess. 

"Oh God Harry, do show some mercy on me sometimes." I used to pout afterwards when he used to make me beg for release after torturing me to insane heights of pleasure.

"What's the fun in that, Ron. The way you respond to my touch. I want to bind you to my bed and not let you go." 

" No matter how much I would love you to do that, you know that I have to go to Malfoy's damn international shoot this weekend."

Now it was Harry's turn to pout. 

"Why don't you come with me, Harry. It is a fucking beach..sand and water and naked me." I wiggled my eyebrows trying to entice him. I could not imagine living apart from Harry even for three days.

"You know I can't, Ron. I have to finish my paintings for Astoria's charity auction." 

"But those painting are mostly me in various states of undress. What would happen if you needed to draw more and your favourite model is not there." 

"Then I promise I would fly to you." 

It was Harry's promise made in fun but still it made the separation bearable to me. Malfoy & Snape had made me their brand ambassador and were ready to spend obscene amount of money on their next campaign so I promised myself that I would be perfectly professional no matter how much I missed Harry or detested Draco Malfoy.

For the first time in my life, I had to travel abroad for a shoot. For me the distance between my village and the city was a chasm too big to cover and now I was travelling on a fucking aeroplane. I could not believe my goddamn luck. We were to shoot on a beach on a exotic island privately owned by Malfoys. Imagine having an entire fucking island to yourself. What do you do with that. Such are the ways of filthy rich. Me and Fleur were the top models for the shoot and I had the impression that she did not like me enough. Cedric was going to be photographer. In spite of all the hullabaloo and excitement, I was pining for Harry . 

Gorgeous was the first thing that came to my mind when we landed there. There were miles and miles of white sand and blue dancing water. The air smelled of exotic scent. It was my version of heaven. I already had various scenarios of me and Harry frolicking in beach and my pants were getting a little tight. There were several big sailing boats or yachts docked on the pier. 

We were to stay in a luxury resort and to my surprise, I had entire suite to myself. It sucked that I was sleeping alone in a king sized bed and it made me realise that Harry and me had never slept in proper bed yet. I was really getting obsessed with thoughts of Harry and I needed some distraction. I spent whole day exploring the island. I soaked myself in sun and sand. It was most fun I had of my own. I longed to sail on these huge yachts and see the parts of the world Harry used to talk about. Me and Harry having adventures like Sinbad the sailor.

"Hey you, there. Aren't you Red, the model of the campaign." 

A leery voice behind me broke my naughty daydreams of sword buckling adventure and sexy Harry in sailor costume . I turned around to see a stocky muscular man walking towards me. He was wearing a expensive suit and a diamond studded watch hung loose from his right wrist. "I am Rabastan Lestrange by the way, co owner of Lestrange industry. I saw you looking at my yacht. What about we enjoy a little time on it tonight. Just you and me." 

Lestranges were brothers who were related to Malfoys and were shareholders in their company. I knew I had to behave politely to the man before me but the way he was looking at me and spoke to me like I was a whore disgusted me and I felt like throwing up. 

"I am sorry, Mr Lestrange. I might have to pass such opportunity, I have to get ready for the shoot tomorrow." I tried to refuse as tactfully as I could.

But the man was insistent and advanced towards me invading my personal space.  
"Don't you look cute acting all pricey. So how much for a little romp in the bed. I can assure you that I would be fucking your sweet ass so hard that you would see the stars. Any price you want, princess.I am making the offer you can not refuse." 

"As I said, I will pass your generous offer. I have other important things to do than being fucked by you.." The lecherous asshole had spoilt the nice time I was having and I felt the need to go to my room and take a elaborate shower to get rid of his filthy eyes on my body. I hated these bastard men who think they own you just because you work under them.

"You fucking piece of shit. How dare you refuse me. I can buy hundreds of you with a snap of my finger." The man shouted at my face getting angrier and violent making me a little afraid. He was big on muscles but I hoped that I could take him down.

"Oh Rabastan, aren't you getting old with this same shit. For God's sake, the boy said No. Can't you understand a simple word but then I always knew you were as stupid as you look." A voice drawled behind us. I remembered the voice from somewhere but I could not make out who. 

"What the hell are you doing here, you scum." Rabastan turned around.

"I was in mood to enjoy the hospitality of my dear cousin Narcissa but now I am thinking of pummelling you like before, remember. Your nose had not looked the same" 

It seemed like unknown man and Rabastan Lestrange had some previous history because the moment the man clenched his fingers into a fist, Rabsastan became white as a ghost and scampered away like a rabbit uttering, "You will pay for this. You have no right to threaten me. I am going to complain to Rodolphus about it. He will make you pay." 

"I am looking forward to meeting Rodolphus too if he has balls to come out of his wife's petticoat." the man mocked after Rabastan laughing and making some boxing gesture.

I realised I had seen that man before. The same deep arrogant voice, tall lithe figure, black slicked hair but last time he had mask on his face hiding his rakish handsome features. His coal black eyes on his aristocratic face spelled danger. He would have been vision in his youth but now with wrinkles around his eyes, he was still simply breathtaking. 

"Oh, It's you, sweetheart." His black eyes held recognition and amusement, " See, we are destined to be together." 

I could not help laughing at the man's outrageous flirting and replied, " Maybe you are mistaking me for somebody else." 

"Hey, I never forget a pretty face but if you have forgotten me, I have ways to make you remember." He said smacking his lips. 

God, the man was incorrigible. I turned into tomato at the memory of our last meeting when he had forcefully kissed me and I had yielded to him. "Don't you dare" I exclaimed with protest.

"Don't get your panties in twist, sweetheart. I distinctly remember you enjoying it as much as I did. So what about encore?" He was enjoying my discomfort. 

"You have no shame, do you? but no thanks. I have already got a great boyfriend. I do not need more kisses from likes of you." I answered back. 

"Where is the great boyfriend of yours, huh sweetheart? last time I checked I have saved your modesty from being ravaged by likes of Rabastan Lestrange. I think I deserve a thank you kiss." 

"Listen whoever you are, I am no damsel in distress. I would have easily defended myself from likes of that man. I have a mean left hook. My whole village can attest to that. So why don't you take you and your thank you kiss and shove it up the place where sun does not shine." I was getting annoyed by the man's brazen flirting antics. 

To my utter astonishment, instead of marching off in anger, the man exploded with laughter. He was holding his belly and guffawing loudly when he said,"It has been years I have heard such language from a finely dressed man like you. Who are you again? You sure are the feisty one. Why don't you ditch that invisible boyfriend of yours and sail away with me. I have got the biggest yacht on the dock, you know what I mean ."   
He wiggled his eyebrows at me.

"You know what I think? I think too much sun and sea had addled your brains. You are one crazy guy. Do you really think you would seduce me to go sailing with you. That was some wishful thinking." 

The man was still smiling bemusedly at my insult though his dark eyes glinted dangerously. His sinewy muscles rippled as he moved towards me and whispered in my ears with his deep baritone ,"Believe me sweetheart, you have not seen anything yet. When I am going to seduce you, you would be moaning my name and begging me to take you away." 

My breath had hitched, my heart was coming to my throat and my skin had broken into gooseflesh. I managed to barely control myself as I replied, "It is a little far fetched don't you think as I do not even know your name." 

He pulled away from me and looked at me from head to toe."That's inconsequential. I promise I will come for you, one day.Till then, keep looking for me, sweetheart."

He blew me a kiss and sauntered away. I stood there watching his silhouette fading away. It was strange coincidence meeting him twice like this. I looked forward to sharing this amusing anecdote with Harry and laughing about it. The man was hypnotising, dangerous and clearly insane but a tiny part of me wished I could meet him again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By now, I think we know who the handsome stranger is. I like a little may December romance. Things are getting bad for Ronnie from next chapter...


	13. The heartbreak

Chapter thirteen

I could not sleep that night drifting between dreams of Harry and unknown stranger. I never expected to meet him again like this and I had to confess that I was unnerved by his blatant seduction. He seemed wealthy and was incredibly handsome . He was personally invited to Malfoy's private party. He owned a fucking yacht and dressed expensively. Yet he had zilch manners and behaved just like my coarse brothers. I had never met a gentleman physically threaten another gentleman like he did to Rabastan Lestrange and it would not have been big surprise if he had actually hit him. The man intrigued me and I wanted to learn more about him but I did not know who to ask. Maybe Harry or Hermione would know about that interesting man.How I wished Harry was here with me but the fact that only one day of shoot was left was balm to my craving heart.

We were supposed to shoot on the beach and I had to wear swimming trunks. Even after months of modelling, I was still conscious of everybody watching me but when Fleur emerged from sea waves like a fucking mermaid, all eyes were glued to her and I was grateful to her for being so distractingly beautiful. Even though I had made friends with Luna and Hermione still I had difficulty talking to women and when that woman is biggest supermodel Fleur Declaour, you could imagine me being either tongue tied or spluttering like a fool. But thank god, Fleur was anything but a thorough professional and she ignored my clumsiness as best as she could even when I missed my cue and stepped on her toes. Though after some hiccups mostly due to me, shoot went on splendidly. The only sore point was presence of Draco bloody Malfoy who took great pleasure in laughing at my blunders and even openly mocking me. As I had promised Pucey that his children would not become orphans prematurely so I kept my mouth shut but stared daggers at them whenever I could. Finally after several agonising hours, it was time to wrap and there were celebration and congratulations though more towards Fleur but I could hardly care. Just a big party tonight and tomorrow I would be with my Harry. I had even started to imagine what I was going to do to naked Harry with my tongue when cold drawling voice of Draco Malfoy interrupted my dirty thoughts.

"Wait Weasley. What happened with uncle Rabastan earlier in the morning. Did you come on to him." He was looking at me strangely, his eyes were filled with accusation or anger or even a hint of jealousy.

"Yes, Malfoy. It is my greatest dream in life to sleep with your hideous and lecherous Uncle.You know we models are the biggest sluts. You already have told me that, I think, one thousand times and your uncle definitely agrees with you. After all you all are made of same piece of cloth."

Truly speaking I was getting tired of either hit upon or insulted by these so called wealthy men. Dean used to say that I was currently the new shining thing that every closeted gay men wanted to covet like a winning trophy. I hated being viewed as a body but I was six foot tall men with long history of physical fights with my brothers so I knew at least I would take care of myself. The only time I was unprepared was during Luna's party but deep inside my heart, I knew I was thrilled and enjoyed the kiss. The credit should be given to that rake. He was an expert. Anyway that was before I discovered how mind blowing and toe curling snogging and sleeping with Harry was. Now, only thing I desired was more and more of my gorgeous Harry.

"Hold your tongue, Weasley." Malfoy was livid with anger.

I could not care a damn. Missing Harry, almost sexually assaulted by Rabastan Lestrange, meeting the pirate guy again and pressure of shoot had taken its toll on me. I felt miserable and tired and longed to just get away from this place.

"I don't think you would believe me if I would say that your uncle sexually harassed me and propositioned me to sleep with him. After all you believe that we models are willing to open our legs to all rich and sundry."

"Nobody molests my models in my fucking island even if it is my Uncle, Weasley. If you want to make an official complaint, I will take desired action."

"What", I was shocked by seriousness of Draco's voice. My stay in this island could not get more crazier. Draco fucking Malfoy was supporting me instead of his goddamn relative.

"Stop gaping at me like an ape and yes, you heard me correctly. So do you want to lodge official complaint for sexual harassment or not."

"I know how to handle myself with these men, Malfoy. But thanks anyway for the support. It was completely unexpected coming from you."

"What can I say, Weasley. I am a man of many talents. See you tonight at the party and remember try to behave like a model not some country bumpkin like you did today at the shoot."

"And you are back to old self, Malfoy. Being a decent human being does not suit you after all. You are too good at being an asshole."

"I am good at many other things too, Weasley. Being nice to you is certainly not one of them. Always remember I am your boss."

"You never make me forget that, Malfoy."

The party was in full swing. The richest and most powerful people strutting around like pompous peacocks. The conversation was so dull and monotonous reminding me of a game of my childhood ,'who's prick is bigger' but instead of pricks, comparison was of cars, villas, personal boxes at races or hotel reservations, planes or yachts and even sexual conquest. The cost of the party would feed my village for one fucking year. In midst of the decadence, I was paraded like a show piece. Just one day left on this god forsaken island and I was twitching to go back to my Harry. Sometimes I wondered why I was here. I did not have grace or sophistication of Fleur or Blaise or flattering verbal skills of Zach or Michael Corner. I always felt like jarring note among this crowd. What if Harry one day got tired of me and my ineptitude and leave me for his own good, the thought was morbid enough for me to seek fortitude in alcohol. I had never thought that I would miss Harry like this. It was like missing a limb or a heart . The duller the evening became, more wasted I got. The warm buzz of alcohol was the only thing preventing me from puking at another talk of global market, exotic vacations or fancy cars.

I was so desperately bored that I even longed for the company of the handsome stranger I was intrigued by. But to my ill luck, even he had disappeared. Though I caught sight of Rabastan Lestrange but seeing me he turned around and walked away fast. That was the only good thing I enjoyed at the party. By night, I was completely drunk that I had forgotten the way to my hotel suite and collided with a waiter causing him to drop the drinks he was carrying.

"God, Weasley. You are so wasted. Stop making a fool of yourself, you idiot." I heard the voice of Draco Malfoy behind me. He held my arms to steady me and pinched me painfully.

"Oye, Malfoy, get your filthy hands away from me." I replied hotly.

"Really, Weasley. Are you sure it is not opposite that you want." Draco smirked.  
All the alcohol I had plied myself with had maybe short circuited my brain and I managed to splutter ," Huh."

"Really, Weasley. What a comeback, you Neanderthal." Malfoy teased me with his irritating smile.

" There is no way in the hell I would ever want you to touch me, Malfoy." I retorted back. The arrogant bastard always made me angry and hot under the skin.

"I don't think so, Weasley as you have still not tried to pry my hands away from your body. Maybe all this denial is just a crap. What you really want is me." Malfoy leered at my body patting me on the butt.

"In your dreams, Malfoy. That day when I let myself be touched by prat like you would never come." I spat angrily. All my good mood and buzz of alcohol was slipping away due to the man standing before me.

"I like it when you are angry, all pumped up.The way your whole face turns red clashing badly with your hair, nostril flaring, blue eyes so wide and your wild look makes me want to taste the passion and feed the anger from your lips. It makes me wonder how uninhibited you would be in my bed under me." Malfoy drawled. And I was suddenly pushed into the wall and his mouth was forced into mine. I gasped at the sudden attack and he forced his tongue into my mouth. He was biting, nibbling and sucking my tongue in an obscene way I never knew existed. He had taken complete control of the kiss and I found myself responding to it to my utter confusion. With one hand, he had gripped the nape of my neck and his other hand was creeping its way down my trousers. I was getting hard and desperate under him. My body was in complete defiance to what my mind was screaming and wanted more of his touch. I was dizzy from all the alcohol I had consumed and lack of oxygen but somehow I found enough strength to push him away to see Draco Malfoy smiling at me like a cat who ate the canary.

I was red in face. Tears sprang to my eyes. I was utterly humiliated and stunned by my actions. How could I writhe like a wanton under the touch of the very man I loathed. I had no idea what had happened. Why would Draco Malfoy who delighted in making my life miserable would snog me like he meant it. And what was with people kissing me without permission as if I were a toy and me responding like a whore. Was I really that pathetic and disgusting. What would Harry think of me.

"You were exactly like what I had imagined, Weasley and much more.Even you can not deny the chemistry between us.I want you in my bed right now to ravage your sexy body and make you scream my name so loud that it would be heard all over this island. " His low hoarse voice was pouring like a poison to my ears. I wanted to run away from him. I had been betrayed by my treacherous body. He was hunter and I was cornered like a game.

Somebody coughed behind us and I was too ashamed to see who that was and hung my head in shame.

"Potter, What a surprise. I was not informed that you were invited to my party."

Potter..Harry. I turned up in horror to see my Harry standing behind Draco. His sparkling green eyes were as hard as jade and his face was complete blank.

_What would happen if you needed to draw more and your favourite model is not there."_

_"Then I promise I would fly to you."_

Harry had missed me and kept his promise. He had flown several miles to see me. Harry had come for me. I was dizzy with happiness when I realised what Harry had just witnessed. Me kissing Draco Malfoy. An ice cold dread ran over me. What if Harry thought I was some disgusting whore. He was the only real thing in this superficial world. The only one who saw me as I was and still liked me enough to come all the way to meet me.I could not lose Harry. I loved him so much that I would die.

"Harry..you came." I whispered.

Draco arched his eyebrows at two of us saying, "I did not know you two knew each other. Weasley does not seem your usual type, Potter. Your taste has gone plebeian, it seems. Maybe I should leave you two alone.I would love to continue what we started, Weasley." He patted my cheeks and walked away.

"Harry..that was..not.."

"I thought I would surprise you. Guess I was the one who got surprised in the end." Harry laughed self deprecatingly.

I cringed in disgust. The panic was building inside him. I could not lose Harry. He was too important to me. I whispered pathetically ,"I missed you so much."

"That's why you were kissing Draco Malfoy. It's okay, Ron. We never said we were dating or we were exclusive. You don't have to look so guilty." Harry said with his voice as calm as a sea before storm.

I could not believe what Harry was saying. He was fine with me kissing Draco. All my worst fears were coming true .Harry did not want to date me. Harry never wanted me as a boyfriend . Harry was like others .He too viewed me as a slut. No, Harry needed to know I was not like Blaise. I could never cheat on Harry. He was the only one.

"No, Harry. I am ashamed of what just happened. I was little drunk and Malfoy cornered me. I did not initiate anything. He attacked me but believe me, I pushed him back. All I ever want is you. I have missed you so much these past days. Every moment without you was a torture for me. I am in love with you, Harry, madly, completely hopelessly in love with you. I have always loved you since the day we met. I know we never talked about this thing we have between us but it's always been love from my part. You are the only one for me." I opened my heart to Harry. I wanted him to see how much I loved him from the bottom of my heart. I wanted him to forgive me. I would not lose Harry.

"Oh my god, Ron. You are the most artless, naive and sexually inexperienced person I have ever seen in my life. How many relationships you had before me, how many partners you had. None. I am the first guy you slept with and bam you have fallen in love with me. I bet you have already started dreaming of happily ever after with me. Are you really that immature? You are the one for me. Really. Where did you steal that line from..a twelve year old girl. I am sorry, Ron. You do not confess declarations of love after knowing somebody for just three four months. What do you really know about me? Do you have any ideas about books I read, art forms I am passionate about. You have to see a lot more of this world and gain more experience and lose this country boy naiveté. You are very good looking and yeah , I find you attractive. You have wormed your way inside my heart with your wide eyed innocence but truth is we are hardly compatible. You were my muse. And I was your first sexual partner. Are you going to fall in love with every guy who is going to sleep with you. It's fine by me that you are experimenting with other men. But love is a big illusion, Ron. Stop deluding yourself and be honest about us. Do you really believe we two are meant to be. I think you know the answer. You would always be special to me but not in the way you want us to be. I hope you understand what I am saying and forgive me for leading you on. "

Yes. I remember every single word, every inflection and expression of his face when he broke my heart leaving me shattered and destroyed. He never loved me. I did not deserve him. We were never meant to be. I was too naive and immature for him. I was never good enough son to my family. I was not good enough friend to Neville. And now I was not enough for Harry too. I would not lament for my shattered heart. Until now I was living a dream of a fourteen year old boy who wanted to see places and learn new things and meet someone. But the reality was stark different. And if I had to survive here, I had to become one of them. I made a promise to myself that day standing at shore overlooking the vast expanse of ocean that I would become a man Harry wanted and then maybe one day Harry would believe in my love and for this, I was willing to wait till eternity.  
But fate however had other plans for me......

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can not believe I have written 30k words of this story. I am going on vacation for two weeks.i would not be able to update new chapter till then :(


	14. The fall

Chapter fourteen 

I screamed my lungs out as I reached the peak of my orgasm while rutting wildly against the hot sweaty body behind me. 

"God, you look so irresistible when you come." I vaguely heard the voice in my ear as I was bit sharply on the shoulder.

"How many time do I have to tell you not to bite so hard with your fangs, you bloody vampire." I complained at the pain throbbing from my shoulder.

"I can not help lose control when you are coming so hard with my cock inside you. You know how thoroughly debauched you look with my hickeys around your neck. I love marking you , Weasley. I own you now." Draco Malfoy drawled while biting my earlobe.

"We mark cattle in our farm, Malfoy. Thanks for reminding me that I am the same for you. Can we try that stuff now which according to you is stairway to heaven." 

"Well yeah, I got it special imported from Russia. One puff and you are seeing sun, moon stars and the whole fucking galaxy." 

" Yeah..Yeah Malfoy.. Just stop bragging and give me that shit right now." 

"You are such an insolent bastard. I do not know why I tolerate you." 

"That's because I give you the best fuck of your life, Malfoy." 

"I can not believe I am still shagging you for past six months. I am never that consistent." 

"What can I say, Malfoy. I am very talented " 

I snorted the powder Draco gave to me and waited for the kick to start and cloud me into the state of haziness. At that moment, I wanted to forget everything. The pain which still pierced like thorn in my heart, the hollowness which I filled with willing naked bodies. I could still hear words "artless, naive, inexperienced" branded across my soul like a taint which I could not get rid of even after purging away my old self. 

Those were darkest days of my life beginning from the day Harry walked away from me. I have memories of being so distraught and pounding at Harry's door desperately till Lady Minerva appeared and told me that Harry was gone. He never came back. Every week, I stood at his door, every week Lady Minerva shook her head apologetically with something akin to pity in her eyes. I went begging to Hermione pleading her to let me speak to Harry for once. I still see her angry brown eyes and hear her sharp words. 

"He came back, Ron. Just packed his bags and left without saying anything. He was supposed to be present for Astoria's charity auction. The day of the auction he told me that he needed to be somewhere. That's last I heard of him. What did you do, Ron" 

"He saw Draco Malfoy kissing me, Hermione." 

" What ! Did you cheat on Harry with Malfoy" 

"I was drunk.. Completed wasted. I missed him all day. I fucking hated that party and all the men at party were looking at me as if I were a gum on their shoe or a toy to be played with so I drank too much and suddenly next thing I knew was Malfoy's tongue inside my mouth and Harry standing there watching us." 

"You idiotic fool. How can you do it to Harry?" 

"Hermione, I am sorry. I was a fool. I begged him to forgive me. I told him I love him. He just walked away and now he is gone. What am I going to do now. I can't live without him." 

"Oh my God, did you tell Harry that you love him. You have scared him away." 

"Why should someone be afraid of love, Hermione. I know I made a mistake. Please help me find Harry. I need to talk to him just once..please Hermione." 

"Oh Ron, you are so simple. Not everything is black and white. Harry is way too complex and complicated. He has lived his life alone and aloof. He never had a long term relationships. He was warming up to you. Then you went on and declared your love after getting caught with Malfoy. God, you are the biggest idiot." 

"He told me I was too naive for him." 

"May be, Harry is right. Maybe you and Harry are not made for each other." 

"Is it because he is way out of my league. I am too stupid, uneducated and uncivilised for him. I was virgin before I met him. Maybe he did not like me in bed. I do not know the ways of this world, Hermione. What am I supposed to do?" 

"I am so sorry, Ron. What do you want to do?" 

"I do not know Hermione. May be my love for Harry is not enough for him to stay with me. I will become the man Harry wants." 

"But you are the one he wants." 

Harry did not return.Dean had eloped with Seamus and I was utterly alone. Even Hermione had stopped feeling sorry for me . There was I rejected by the one I loved and lusted by people I loathed. It was crystal clear to me that Harry never wanted me as a lover. Mentally we were never the match but maybe I did not satisfy him sexually too. 

It is so ironic that the world does not bat an eyelid even when your insides are screaming with pain. Nobody hears the sounds of your heart breaking. Nobody sees unshed tears inside your eyes. The world moves on at its brisk pace and you have two options left. Either you wallow in your misery or you brush that off and reinvent yourself. Recovering from the loss was gradual and painful. I was too deep in my attachment to Harry. For months every day felt like a burden. When I looked at myself in mirror, all my flaws and imperfections glared back at me in magnifying details. I was never a self confident type of guy and Harry broke something inside me but what is life but trials and tribulations. I was a complete mess till one day Blaise took pity on me and took me to one of his infamous party. It was hilarious that the first person I met there was the very man who had all but destroyed my life. I was drowning in self doubts when I saw Draco Malfoy at Blaise's party. And this time when he kissed me, I kissed him back. 

"Weasley, you better control yourself. You are digging yourself deeper with this fucking habit." 

"I did not know Malfoy that you care about your fucks. I am a big boy..big city boy now. I can handle anything." 

"Really, from what I heard from Pucey that you have missed your last two shoots because you were stoned as shit." 

"Are you spying on me, now. Jealous that I might be fucking others behind your back." 

"Oh please, Weasley. You are free to shag whoever you want. I was just reiterating what Pucey was whining about." 

"That son of a bitch. I am the one who is putting money in his pockets and what the asshole does is bitch about me. What can I do. Every one wants a piece of me. I am so fabulous." 

"You are so high right now, Weasley. It is real pathetic to watch." 

"Really, Malfoy. So why are your hands roaming on my thigh when I look so pathetic." 

Drugs.. They were the things I never thought I would ever touch . Being a model meant endless supply of it. The stress, cut throat rivalries, sycophancy and very short shell life of a model meant invariably you got sucked into this deadly vortex of drug and booze. I managed to stay clear of it because I was still afraid of what my Mum would think of me and also because during that time, I was raving mad for Harry that I did not feel the need for anything else . But now I was dependent on them like an oxygen. I can not recollect when it all began. Maybe it was one of Blaise's party. I was miserable and alone when someone accosted me with lines to snort, I was beyond care and with inhalation of just one line, I felt all the misery and darkness inside me melting away being replaced by feeling of recklessness and freedom. In my drug addled brain, there was no reminiscences of pain Harry had caused me. I was high as a kite and wanted to embrace the world before me with open arms or legs because in the morning I found myself naked in bed with Draco fucking Malfoy. I had not even remembered what had happened in the night. But I knew I wanted to feel it again ..the state of complete oblivion where your grief or your flaws or your insecurities did not hurt you anymore. I did not care who I ended up in bed with during those times but mostly it was Malfoy and slowly and slowly I began to crave his touch as I craved for my drugs. 

There was not even illusion of rosy coloured future in my relationship with Draco Malfoy. He wanted me and I wanted someone to desire me. Sex, of course, was great. But there was no tenderness in any way he used to hold me afterwards. There was no overwhelming happiness as if my heart would pour out of my pores which I used to feel with Harry. I used to feel sated and a bit used and as glutton for punishment I was ready to be there whenever he wanted me. 

The deadly cocktail of sex and drugs was affecting my professional life. I started going late for shoots and even skipped some. Pucey's angry words had no influence on me. I was still much in demand model. After success of that international shoot, I was catapulted to the top and I realised that I now had power to do what I liked. The success is a fickle mistress and I was enjoying it while it lasted. With Dean gone, Hermione avoiding me after hearing rumours of me and Draco, I was a foolhardy ship without any anchor. As Blaise Zabini was my only well wisher, this ship was bound to wreck. How I wish I had ability to see my mistakes then. 

Blaise was a loose cannon and he had men lying at his feet. Me, jilted and rejected for being who I was, realised that Blaise was the best example to follow. He was sharp and shrewd to the ways of the world and men and the best way for me to lose my country boy naïveté was to become someone like him. I started attending all those late night parties of debauchery. There were abundance of naked flesh, heady drugs and free alcohol and rich, powerful men throwing away money like water. I could now declare from rooftops that I was not that naive ,inexperienced country bumpkin anymore. But the man who had made me this hedonistic thrill seeking tease still did not come back. 

 

Of course those late night revelries caused me loss of many lucrative contacts. Since I was calling the shots now, I became careless after all there were no lack of rich men willing to indulge my tiniest whims and letting me get away with my unprofessionalism and lack of punctuality. Pucey threatened to oust me from his agency. I paid no heed to his repetitive threats. Every warning or reprimands was like white noise to me. Even when Severus Snape dissolved Malfoy and Snape's contact with me, I hardly broke a sweat. I was fucking their future heir after all. 

It was during the biggest party of the year on the yacht of Barty Crouch junior when I finally lost it. Barty Crouch junior was another unscrupulous rich boy who was used to having his way owing to his father's political lineage. His parties were known for big gambling dens where millions of money were put at stake. The glamour was provided by models and atmosphere was created by psychedelic drugs. Malfoy had casually mentioned to me previous day that he was getting engaged to Astoria Greengrass following month after our usual fuck session. Astoria Greengrass was society's darling, fashionista, and philanthropist in short a perfect trophy wife for Malfoy. It was not as if I had not expected it. I knew what I was to Malfoy and I also knew what Draco meant to me. I was not fool enough to fall for him. He with his vicious tongue and sexy body had become more like a habit to me. So when I heard of his impending nuptials, I was not heartbroken per se. Draco Malfoy was meant to marry Astoria Greengrass in the same vein as Harry belonged to someone well educated and genteel. Who was I in front of them. A body to quench their desire with. I could never compete with Astorias and Oliver Woods. I knew my place in societal hierarchy. Models like me came and went without a trace. We were entertainment of night definitely not somebody to spend your life with. Few of us were lucky like Dean who had Seamus Finnigans waiting for them with open arms. 

I drank myself to oblivion that night and snorted too many lines to count. The deep chasm in my heart growing bigger with every shot I took. My family had settled in nicely without me. They had bought bigger farm lands from the money I sent and were doing well. The letters from them had trickled to one every two three months. They never even came to visit me in the city believing that I belonged to here now. Through them I came to know of Neville's marriage. He also had moved on and he deserved all the happiness in his way too. I had no one left in this fucking world. Even Draco Malfoy was waxing eloquently about his future wife like a fucking love struck boy. What was wrong with me that nobody wanted to take a chance on me and repulsed the man I loved to run away. Was I going to end up all alone, unloved and uncared for and live life as someone's dirty little secret and nothing else. 

I can not recollect much about that night except how high I was that I even failed to protest when I was dragged to a dark room under the deck of the ship by someone. When I came a little to my senses I was half naked with completely naked Barty Couch hovering above me. I tried to shove him away but my reflexes were incoherent and the man was holding me in tight grip. I shouted for help and he covered my mouth stifling my cries. For a moment I thought this was the way I was going to die, raped and murdered with my body thrown in the ocean to hungry sharks.I tried to gather all the strength I could muster and fought him back making him more angrier and violent. He hit me hard on my face and I felt something like blood trickling from the corner of my mouth . I just closed my eyes and prayed for this nightmare to end. I heard loud thump and suddenly weight of the man above was lifted from me.

"What the hell is going on here. Oh my God it's you! Are you fucking alright, sweetheart." 

The voice belonged to a man who had apparently rescued me and to my astonishment he was my pirate guy holding a poker in his hand and unconscious body of Barty junior lying at his feet. I suddenly had strange urge to laugh. 

He was rather shocked at my unexpected laughter. There I was half naked laughing at the man who had saved me from getting raped. The ways his eyes widened in disbelief made me laugh even harder. He pulled me up and said "Ok, sweetheart.. Let's get you clothed and get the fuck away from this hell." 

" Did you just kill the minister's son. I am not going anywhere with you. I don't trust pirate dudes."I replied trying to wiggle away from his touch still not sober enough.

"The bastard is just knocked out. I did not kill him . The tosser owed me money he had lost in gambling. I went looking for him only to find you two. How funny that you trust this idiot to go frolicking around and not me who had actually saved your ass I guess countless times so far.

"Oh my hero. At least I know this bastard's name. You are some pirate guy with bad habit of appearing randomly in my life."I slurred tapping my fingers on his broad chest. 

"Well, Sirius Black at your service, sweetheart.", the man bowed his head in mock courtesy and added," Now that introduction part is over, can we fucking get the hell away from here." 

Sirius Black. His name was the last thing I muttered before passing out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh God, I was so afraid of posting this chapter..finally I did it..next one is all about Sirius Black. Btw he was quite a rockstar in his youth in books..


	15. Sirius

Sirius Black. "Enfant terrible" "abomination to noble House of Blacks" "reckless bastard" " heartless rake" I had heard many colourful adjectives of the man before I finally met him. And what a man he was. The Blacks were the powerful political family with insane lofty ambitions. Almost all the sons across the generations had a legacy to live up to and follow. The future of every Black heir was written up for him even before he was born. It was into this world an anomaly called Sirius Black happened. There were so many rumours around that man that he had become an legend himself. Some say when he was young he set fire on the house when he was not allowed to ride his favourite pony, others say he ran away at age fifteen with his fathers' sail boat and was found frolicking with natives in an island one month later. There were gossips of him having illicit relations with his mother's friends at age of twelve and by the time he was sixteen he had slept with half of the society's most eligible debutantes. He was banished by his family when he came of age and lived riotously with James Potter. Both James Potter and Sirius Black stuck like sore thumbs with their devil may care attitude and were rather infamous for their numerous misadventures. Nobody knows whether there was an iota of truth in tales about Sirius Black but everybody believed in his legend. The only thing true about Sirius Black was his irrevocable friendship with James Potter, father of Harry. Sirius Black had become a vagabond after the death of Potters but still his sightings were matter of great interest and intrigue in society even today.

I did not know that the man who had kissed me without permission leaving me tingling with desire or had flirted shamelessly with me was infamous Sirius Black. For me, he was Harry's absentee godfather who always gave Harry and his friends outrageous birthday presents and once gifted Luna an orang utan. I liked stories Harry and Hermione told about their crazy uncle. I visualised Sirius Black as someone old and wrinkling. Imagine my surprise when I realised that devastatingly handsome man with rugged good looks golden tanned skin and dark eyes sparkling with mischief was none other than Sirius. He was wrong for me in all the ways but somehow it still felt right to wake up under his scrutinising gaze.

My head was pounding like dozen elephants were marching inside it and playing trumpets when I woke up in the morning. I groaned in pain and managed to blink my eyes open only to see Sirius Black chuckling in front of me. I glared at him and then I realised I was completely naked. He was leaning against the door obviously enjoying my mortification. I was a fucking model who had dozen nude photoshoots under my resume still I blushed red when I saw his teasing eyes wandering over my body. 

"Liking what you see.." I managed to retort. 

"A bag of bones with beaten up face..not my thing, sweetheart." he quipped raising his eyebrows. 

I flushed with anger at his mocking words. It was true that I hardly ate these days and had lost considerable amount of weight. No one in my agency or clients had any objection to it in fact they had even encouraged me to lose weight so I never bothered that I could see ribs protruding from my body moreover I was proud of the fact that there was not a single pound of extra flab in my body. I was always fond of eating and my Mum was an excellent cook. As a worker in farm, you had to eat to stomach's full to work hard. Food was just another sacrifice I had given to become new me. I had already lost my integrity, honesty, innocence ,what was a mere loss of appetite when I had nothing left.

"Just to remind you that this body is considered the best in modelling and fetches millions in contracts." I bristled with anger. 

"Really", he was unfazed, "I did not know skeletons passed as models these days. Do you know how emaciated you look since the last time I saw you. Are your people starving you or is it only drugs which you have for both breakfast or dinner these days." 

"Don't you dare meddle in my business. I will do whatever I like. You don't own me or anything." His criticism of me had hurt me more than it should. 

" There is saying in one tribe that if you save somebody's ass, that ass is yours. So that makes me proprietor of your bony ass so I have full right to meddle in any business of yours." 

"Are you fucking insane. I think you have made this up just now." I was outraged by man's insolence. 

"Oh, I am damn serious. You do know I saved you from that lech last night. You even called me your hero." 

"Listen, I am thankful for what you did. I would like to leave now." 

"You really are ungrateful little shit. I risked my fucking life for you. Dear Barty has many nefarious connections, you know."

"I don't remember asking for your help." 

"You were too high to remember, sweetheart."

"Whatever..what the hell.how do you want me to show your gratitude. Should I go down on my knee and express my sincere thanks to you for risking your precious life for my bony ass." God, the man was infuriating. 

"Nothing that dramatic but you on your knees do seem like an interesting position. All I want of you is just spend a week with me." 

I could not believe my ears. I was practically living with swarming bastards but this one topped each one of them. I exclaimed, "You can't be serious." 

"Oh, Please, rein in your overactive imagination. I am not making you my sex slave or anything but if you want that sort of arrangement, I certainly won't refuse. I merely request your company if you will." 

Blushing furiously at his innuendos, I questioned suspiciously, "Why? why do you want me to spend a week with you." 

"I have fallen crazily in love with you since the time I first saw you in that party. How's that for an answer." He replied advancing towards me with sure steps.

"What."I managed to squeak covering up my nakedness with sheath of clothes.

He just sat down opposite me and winked at me saying, "You act like you are blushing virgin. I think you keep forgetting the fact that it was I who brought you here yesterday and undressed you and even resisted you seducing me. You are pretty persuasive when you are high." 

"I still can't understand your motives." I said defiantly while trying to control butterflies which were fluttering inside my stomach at the close proximity to the man. 

"Let's just say..boredom. I have some family business to attend to which might take a week or two and I find your company very interesting." He drawled picking his nails. 

"You hardly know me. I think you don't even know my name. We have met three times so far and two of those time you grated on my nerves like a lech and last time, i was too passed out to look remotely interesting." I said angrily.

To my surprise, he gave me his widest smile and replied, "I want to give you another chance to prove me wrong. So it's decided that Ronald Weasley, the top male model is spending next week in exalted company of Sirius Black, a man extraordinaire." 

God, I hated his guts then and I hate them even now. I was shocked at how brazenly he had propositioned me. I do not know why I said yes but I know that I couldn't have refused. Sirius always evoked conflicting emotions inside me. I wanted to murder him with my bare hands and in next second, I was laughing with my ass off at his antics. 

Our first 'date' was little diner by the sea and Sirius Black had ordered every thing on the menu because according to him ' I needed to fatten up to human standards.' Though I protested loudly but the truth was it was the first time I had enjoyed eating food after a very long time. I even managed to finish the apple pie by myself which got me greatest cheers from him. All through that day, I never once needed to resort to drugs for escapism. He regaled me with stories about his sailing adventures. I wondered whether he knew about Harry and me. It felt natural sitting there besides him amongst the din of streaming ships and crowd jostling around and smell of fish market. He was at ease in these uncouth places as he was in high society meetings. The bastard had unique ability to charm the pants off everybody and so why would I remain unaffected by him. 

Seven days. He wanted to spend seven days with me and those seven days are vividly etched into my mind. Those seven days were a little ray of sunlight in dark abyss that my life had become those days. He took me to unexpected places, an illegal dog fighting ring or Chinese market or quaint Japanese or Indian restaurants. Yeah, I tried hard to remain unimpressed, I tried hard not to laugh at his offensive jokes and I really really tried harder not to miss him every night but somehow he had wormed his way inside my thoughts. Those long walks we took reminded me of those months with Harry but now the bitter pain and silent desperation or need of oblivion did not rush through me forcefully. Even Pucey had started to regain his trust on me. At the end of the week, I was frantic with anxiety that I would not be able to see him again. I did not want to let him go so soon.

"Do you realise what day is today?" I asked him coolly while my heart was filled with dread.

"Not my or your birthday, I presume." He quipped. 

"Its's seventh day. Our so called arrangement is going to be over today." 

"It seems to me that someone is looking forward to it. I am sorry to disappoint you sweetheart, I am not going anywhere soon." 

My heart leapt with joy at his words still I said, "What if I want to get rid of you." 

He as always quirked his eyebrows, "You can't. You keep forgetting that I own your ass now and it is still not up to my standards." 

"Incorrigible bastard." I muttered under my breath but from insides, I was giddy. Yeah, it's been ages since I had felt that emotion. An era or lifetime back. I thought I had forgotten to smile, to laugh and to be happy. Sirius brought those emotions back inside me. He nudged me gently away from wasteland of my life and stirred me towards a new path. Seven days turned into weeks and then into months and he was still there sharp eight o'clock outside my building standing gracefully and swearing ungentlemanly and I used to walk towards him pretending that I was not digging holes in carpet waiting for him all this time. 

"Is it true that you lost virginity with your mother's friend at age twelve?" 

"Who is responsible for these outrageous rumours. I was ten and it was one of the house maids." 

"Did you run your father's Rolls Royce over the cliff when he refused to have showgirls on your eighteen birthday. 

"Again another big fat lie. It was Bentley." 

"Sirius, when are you ever serious." 

"Okay Ronnie, I am serious now and may I ask you a question." 

"Are you proposing to me, Mr Black." 

"Bat your eyelashes like this and I will elope with you right now. What do you say of going with me to Young Malfoy's engagement party. He is kinda my nephew and I promise I will not let bloody Lestrange paw at you." 

Draco Malfoy..his name brought me back to stark reality of my life. The countless nights spent in drug induced haze under his hard body, trading barbs in messy bedsheets, the scratches and bite marks covered under layers of make up. How could his engagement completely slip out of my mind when the mere news of it fuelled what I can now describe as the lowest point of my life. Was I ready to face him? Was I strong enough to see two rich privileged people vowing to cherish each other under dazzling lights, pomp and grandeur." 

"Do you want me to go to the engagement party of man I have been fucking for past one year."

He was rather shocked at my blunt statement and said, " When I saw you out of your senses that day on Barty's yacht party, was that about Draco Malfoy? You were seeing him. Do you love him." 

I laughed bitterly at hearing the word love coming from his mouth and replied,"We fucked..that was it. Love. I do not know what that is. For me it is nothing but a fucking pain which never goes away however I fucking try to hide it or forget it" 

His voice was subdued when he said,"You have to learn to live with it, sweetheart." 

He was looking at me as if he knew what heartbreak was and he understood what losing someone meant but somehow seeing pain in his eyes made me angry after all he was one of them, heartless wealthy assholes and I shouted ,"What do the great Sirius Black, a heartless rake know about love. Life is just a big joke for you. Who am I to you, latest game to get over your boredom." 

I tried to run away from him but Sirius was too quick. He held me in his arms tightly and said icily,"Do you want to be my latest conquest. Do you think so lowly of yourself?"

I squirmed under his tight grip and his stormy dark eyes. He was laying my soul bare and I wanted to bolt. I shoved him saying ,"Get the hell away from me. I do not need your pity." 

He was then furious with me and his eyes glinted with anger as he said calmly "I am giving you my friendship not my pity. I like you. Why can't you understand it." 

I scoffed, "You want my friendship? Am I not too naive, simple, inexperienced or uncivilised for you." Those words, still echoing inside my mind came out like a thunderbolt. The words which had ruined me once and still destroy me bit by bit, the words from which I could never escape. 

"You are perfect for me." One single sentence and then he kissed me. He kissed me like he meant it. He kissed me like there were no tomorrow. He kissed me like he would suck those damn words out of my soul. Like he would devour all the darkness residing inside my heart and leave me light as a feather. Ever since that fateful day of masquerade party, Sirius had never initiated the physical contact with me till now, though there were nudge to shoulder, pat on the back, accidentally touching of hands which invariably made me little fuzzy from inside, But with this kiss he broke a barrier inside me and I got drowned in its intensity. We were breathless and moaning and still did not stop tasting each other. He snaked his around my waist and the mere touch of his fingers in my naked flesh burnt me with desire. I wanted him like I had never wanted someone else.

I remember being so scared afterwards when I went back to my place. I was living in a daze for past one year, always high on drugs or in throes of despair and darkness, bathing in self loathing, finding asylums in hard fucks and utter oblivion. I had given so much of myself to Harry that I was bereft of everything. He had drained all colours from me leaving behind a blank canvas. And now, Sirius Black was leaving his little marks on it. His black eyes like a dark night, his full bellied laughter like orange leaves on autumn, his light touches like multicolored butterflies, and his red hot passion. He was bringing colours back to my life and I was afraid to reach out to them. I was scared to embrace these new feelings sprouting in my heart. Happiness only stayed as a transient guest in my life. I was not among those fortunate ones who were loved in return. Sooner or later, Sirius would stop finding me 'perfect' and go on his never ending adventure leaving me behind alone. I was stupid to even hope that Sirius Black would remain in one place for one person. I could not fall for that rake. I had to stop seeing him. 

I threw myself again in modelling atoning for my past mistakes.I invented thousand excuses refusing to meet Sirius. He stood there waiting every day stoic and silent while I hid behind the curtains watching him turning his back and going away. I was not a fresh face anymore moreover my exploits of past year had made me notorious. The work became dwindling slowly and one day Sirius did not come. The feeling of hopelessness started engulfing me again and my body started craving for drugs again. It felt as if these past three four months never happened and I was again lost in darkness and this time even Draco Malfoy was not there to fuck my pain away. I was too weak to resist the magic of the high which a snort of coke gave me and succumbed to it. 

Looking back now, I can say that was one of the most disgraceful thing I ever did and I would always be ashamed of it. My nights again started getting lost in clouds of drug induced haze. But like a towering lighthouse, Sirius found me again.How absolute furious he was, his eyes burning with fire. He grasped me and tore me away from that place. I was too intoxicated to even apprehend where he was taking me till ice cold water was poured over my head by thunderous Sirius Black. 

"What the hell were you doing there." He literally growled the words. 

"Enjoying the party. I am a free spirit. I do not belong to you. I can do whatever I want." I replied back shamelessly.

My words changed something inside him as he slipped on the floor saying seriously, " I know you do not belong to me. But why are you doing this, Ronald. Why are you hell bent on destroying yourself. Why?" 

I replied nonchalantly, "You would never understand it, the great Sirius Black." 

"Then make me understand." He pleaded. 

"You would never understand. You people with your luxurious lives, having bottomless pit of money, travelling aboard on your big yachts, making arts, owning fucking islands and trampling on somebody's heart like it is nothing. You would never understand what love is..what being in love is like. For you people, it's just a game. You go bored with one person and find new interests and the whole world is still ready to lie under your feet. What do you know about hunger or what being poor curtails. What do you know about rejection? You do not know what being a failure is. And you would definitely not know what it feels like when someone you love leaves you stranding alone and heartbroken with only one question in your mind.. why..why? How will you know what feelings are, you stone hearted porcelain people. You only know how to use people. Emotions means nothing to you."

"Oh God, you are so pathetic." Sirius sneered at me, "So what if somebody broke your heart. It does not mean you give up and destroy your life. You think you are the only one who lost his love. Have you buried your love and your best friend with your own hands. Have you regretted one decision you made all your life. That you wished you had not stayed at home that night and gone with them or made them stay. Has one night changed your life forever. One night when in an instant your love and your closest friend and his wife were taken away from you forever leaving you alone with a three year old godson. You rebelled against everybody, you stood against your parents and fought for the man you loved and when impossible dream was going to become a reality, it was snatched away from you so cruelly and unexpectedly. You remember looking at a crying toddler knowing that you were responsible for his parent's death. It was because of you, a son would never know the love of parents. Welcome to real world, Ron. Everybody hurts and every one suffers. You are not the only one. But you man up and live life anyway. Do you think twenty years is too long to lessen the pain. No, it's not. You are going to feel this pain your whole life and learn to live with it. Does these drugs really make you forget. No, I don't think so. This pain is part of you are, you have to accept it and for god's sake don't throw your life away. It is too precious and fragile to waste. There are still some people who cares for you...at least try to live for them.."

I sat there speechless, stunned at his words. The immeasurable grief in his eyes and darkness inside his heart that I got glimpse of was beyond my comprehension. I could only stutter.."Sirius.." I took his face in my trembling hands and buried my face in his neck whispering, "I am sorry." He pulled my hair back and kissed me hard on lips. I opened my mouth to let him have everything I had to offer. I wanted to absorb all his pain with my body.He pushed me against the wall and held my hands above my head nuzzling my neck, biting and sucking the skin. It took us a single minute to tear our clothes off each other and his strong body was against mine. I could feel the muscle rippling under my fingers on his back. He was naked, hard, panting and devouring me with his coal black dilated eyes. At that moment he was both a storm waiting to blow me away to smithereens and an anchor to hold on to. His big hands were roaming across my body leaving behind trail of gooseflesh and fire. And when he touched my weeping cock, I lost all my senses. "Sirius" I moaned his name and wrapped my long legs around his waist. He entered me in a single thrust and I cried out in pain bordering on pleasure. I did not need his pity or gentleness. I needed him to fuck me raw and hard . The hard wall against my shoulder was chafing my shoulder, my hands were pinned by his iron grip leaving bluish red bruises and I did not fucking care. It tore out of me like a hot molten lava burning my insides as I screamed his name. I had been fucked so many times and made love to a few times but what Sirius and I had that day could not be described in mere words. It was something primal animalistic, a hunger or a need. We collapsed on the floor wrung out, boneless shocked at the intensity of what had happened.I was aching in all places but where it always ached the most..my heart..it was full, full of undefined emotions or intangible feelings. He took me in his strong arms and held me against his chest. I could hear his erratic heartbeats slowly coming back to rhythm as they lulled me to sleep. 

Next morning when I woke up, I was pleasantly surprised to find myself again in Sirius' bed. The still warm sheets on my side meant Sirius slept with me and somehow the thought that Sirius carried me to his bed and stayed with me warmed me from inside. I know it sounds cliched but I felt reborn. I had been wallowing in misery for so long and blaming whole world for it and now it was time for me to fight back and land on my own legs instead of holding on to crutches of drugs and alcohol. Sirius Black taught me a great life's lesson. Accept your pain, move forward and live life without regrets. From that moment onwards, I could say I finally came to my senses. I had reached lowest ebb in my life and now was the time to bounce back. And I was grateful to Sirius Black for putting me back on the track. The memories of last night flooded back to me and I blushed at the sight of bruises on my naked body. He had made me feel alive and it was electrifying and I needed to feel it again. I carelessly put on night robe and went searching for him. 

He was standing with his back towards me next to breakfast counter reading something . He was naked from waist up and his silk blue pyjamas were riding low on his hips. The sight of his muscular tanned torso shining in sunlight was salivating and I instantly turned hard. I sneaked noiselessly towards him and wrapped my arms around his chest and nuzzling his neck whispered, "Good morning." 

He scrunched piece of paper in his fist and turned towards me. His face was blank but his eyes were stormy with emotions as he said to me, " Harry has come back."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay..one chapter left and then epilogue.


	16. The choice

They say when God created the world, he split one soul in two and sent it to earth. Sometimes these half souls meet, merge and become whole and sometimes these two parts of one soul collides with each other and turn away. Nobody can predict the fate of these souls. The moment I had seen Harry for the first time, I knew he was the one. I had barely spoken two words to him and I was gone. I had spent countless tormented nights dreaming about him. I was crazy about him even after knowing the fact that he hardly recognised me. I believed that my unrequited feelings would fade away with time. But then the miracle happened, Harry wanted me too.The time I spent with Harry is one of the most precious things in my life. Sometimes you wait a lifetime for your one wish to come true. Harry was my that wish which came true but unfortunately did not last long. He left me devastated and I lost myself in wilderness and now when I was just getting ready to rebuild my life, he came back like a storm and I was left shaken again.

My heart was bubbling with unexpected joy and happiness when I had opened my eyes that day. There was only one name in my lips and my eyes were impatient to see that handsome bastard who took my breath away with slight turn of his eyebrows. Sirius had come to my life uninvited and now I could not imagine myself without him. I was so nervous to what he was going to say after the night we spent together. Would he be happy l or would he treat me like any of his request but for life of me, I could have never expected those words..

"Harry has come back, Ron."

I staggered backwards. He was looking at me intently, the damn piece of paper curled like a ball in his fist. Did he know about Harry and me?

"Harry is sick, Ron. He is very sick. I am sorry I need to see him now."

Apart from one passing reference that Harry was his godson, Sirius and I had never talked about Harry. I was still too wounded to tell Sirius about Harry and he respected my silence. But Harry was there, an invisible force between us which we never acknowledged and now he was not invisible anymore. He was here and he was sick. Very sick according to Sirius. Maybe he was ill that's why he did not come back. He was sick somewhere with nobody to care for him while I was being fucked by Draco Malfoy the whole time. What if something happened to him and I never knew about it? Suddenly I could not breathe and dizziness and darkness surrounded me.

"Ron..Ronald. Are you okay. Take deep breaths, sweetheart."

Sirius had pushed my head between legs and was telling me to take breaths. The concern on his handsome face was overwhelming. I managed to say, "Sirius..Harry..I.."

He was holding me steadily and said, "I know, Ronnie. We will talk about it later. Taking care of Harry is the most important thing now. I have to go now, sweetheart. Do you want to come with me."

Harry was his godson and Sirius had to take care of him. But what about me . Would he be angry to see my face. Wouldn't it be naive or stupid to rush to meet him.I could not just barge into Harry's house like this no matter how much I wanted to. I was an ex lover..neither a relative nor even a friend.

"He needs you, Sirius. You go and take care of your godson."

These were the words I managed to blurt out. I did not know what I felt. I wanted Sirius to be there for Harry but I did not want to leave his embrace. I wanted to run all the way to Harry's but here I was telling Sirius that I was not going. He nodded his head and hugged me tightly. He planted a messy kiss on my forehead and left.

I returned to my boardings to see distraught Hermione pacing around frantically.

"Thank God, Ronald. Where were you. Harry is not well. You have to come see him. Please." She was a blabbering mess.

I had never seen Hermione so undone. She was always calm and composed whenever I met her. To see her in such state was unnerving and I felt a panic building inside me.

"Please tell me what's happening. Is he ok. Hermione."

I could see tears welling up in her eyes as she tried to take control of herself.

"I do not know, Ron. After ..you know.. I hardly heard from him. Even Lady Minerva hardly got one or two letters from him from unspecified locations. Sirius even went searching for Harry but Harry refused to come. He became reckless and foolhardy. He settled around some plantations in Latin America and they say he contracted some kind of 'brain fever'. He refused treatment initially and then situation got worse, Ron. He had become delirious and was hallucinating all the time. Some Englishmen there tried to contact Sirius but messages failed to reach him but thank god for those people, they finally brought Harry home. He is not good, Ron. Even in his hallucinations, he continued to paint and they were all of yours. That's why you need to come with me. I beg you, Ron. Please, maybe, you are our last hope. I know I blamed you wrongly for making Harry leave. It was never your fault. It was his..his phobia for commitment. There is still a flicker of hope..."

I just ran..ran all the way to Harry's house without even taking break to catch my breath. Harry..his sparkling green eyes, his beautiful face, his colour streaked messy hair, his absent minded smiles and his habit of smoking chain less cigarettes and always carrying sketchbook under his arms..Harry whom I had worshipped like a devotee, Harry who broke my heart into pieces, my Harry was dying and I refused to believe it. He was going to be fine. I would make sure of it even if I had to fight destiny for it.

Months ago, I had stood before the same door with same desperation to see just a mere glimpse of him. This time, I was let in. I was taken not to his room but to Harry's studio. The servant told me that Harry felt at peace there. Sirius was standing by the door with his face covered by his hands. Lady Minerva was sitting by Harry's bedside and Harry was sleeping. No, he was not my Harry. The person sleeping on the bed was not the same man who had made love to me in this room so many times. His skin was deathly white, eyes were sunken and had lost half of his body weight. The long fingers which weaved magic on both blank canvas and my skin were just skin and bones.

"Harry.."I whispered as I sat besides him. He opened his eyes. God, I had forgotten how green like fresh leaves the colour of his eyes were. I took his hand in mine. He was hot and sweaty but his feverish mind still recognised me.

"R.Ron.."He said my name in his hoarse and weak voice. I fought valiantly not to break down before him. He needed us to be strong. I could not show my weakness to him.

"How are you, Harry. I am here, now. I am not going to leave your side till you are up and about." I said with my words getting choked.

"I.." He was trying to say something and I bent forwards to put my ears to his mouth, " I.. Can I paint you for the last time."

I could not stop tears trickling down my tears. They fell like drops on his hollow cheeks.  
"Please, Harry. You are going to make so many masterpieces. I would not let anything happen to you." I took his hands and raised them to my lips. I would sit here till eternity if I could but I would not lose Harry.

"It's time for his medication, Ron."

I did not know how long were I sitting there holding his hands and kissing his fingers and putting cold sponges on his burning body.

"You can go and take some rest,Ron." Lady Minerva told me with concern.

"I can't. Please let me stay here for few minutes more."

"Nobody is forcing you to go, Ron. You stay here as much as you like, child."

Harry was sleeping peacefully like a little boy. His fever had finally come down as I brushed his sweaty hair from forehead.

"Are you okay?"

I heard familiar voice and strong and warm hand on my shoulder.

"He was the one."

"I knew. I knew the moment I saw his painting of you when I came back from meeting you in that island. He never talked much even as a child. He was shy and sensitive kid with his big curious eyes. He looked so much like James. I used to feel so guilty just seeing him all alone in this big house. I was a horrible godfather. I failed James. I could not take care of his son. I would have forced Harry to come back but he was adamant on staying away from here. He was always stubborn son of bitch. I will never forgive myself if something happens to Harry."

"Harry is going to be fine, Sirius."

I still do not know from where I got the strength to say those words. But I believed blindly and strongly that nothing bad would happen to Harry.

"You are right. He is stubborn like his father. If there were only one person in this whole world to make it, it would definitely would be our Harry."

Our Harry. Harry was not completely mine. He belonged to all of us. Lady Minerva who never missed a second of Harry's medicine time. Hermione and Luna who lived there practically all the time. Albus who researched and hunted for the cure. Sirius who literally abducted all the renowned specialist doctors. For weeks, we sat there praying for his recovery, getting excited over small signs of hope or becoming dejected when he relapsed but we never once lost hope. God finally answered our fervent prayers and Harry remained fever free for one day and gradually it extended to two days and then a week. He stopped being delirious. His eyes got their sharp glint back. He accepted taking more spoons of broth and finally he started talking. It was a miracle which had happened in front of our eyes.

As Harry entered his road to recovery, my past demons came back to haunt me. Till then, taking care of Harry and praying for his recovery was the only thing I did but now I was uncertain to what Harry and I meant. In his feverish and delirious state, he needed me. He used to call my name and became very upset if I were not there. Harry was clear headed and fine now, he could again see my inadequacies which made him reject me once.Would he still need me now?

The day Harry walked on his foot for the first time, I made a decision not to intrude on his life anymore. He had Sirius, Hermione and Lady Minerva to support him. I did not go visit him for two days when Sirius came to me seething with anger. He was standing in the same spot he used to before yet everything had changed. His face did not show arrogant amusement, his eyes did not twinkle with mischief and his bedazzling smile was not there when he saw me.

"Why the hell you did not come to see Harry? The poor guy is asking about you incessantly. How can you be so cruel and thoughtless?"

"What about me, Sirius. What about us?"

Harry's illness had drained me of everything. Was it selfish of me that I wanted the comfort of Sirius' arms around me and wished I could laugh again at his antics.

"There was never us, Ronnie. We were merely two broken people who happened to share some moments together. Harry needs you, sweetheart. You and him are sure thing, believe me."

I had never heard Sirius sounded so resigned and lifeless. Even in his outburst of grief, Sirius brimmed with life. Maybe for Sirius, our relationship meant nothing but a friendship but for me, Sirius was life saver. He had snatched me away from pits of darkness. I wanted to believe him that Harry wanted me but wound Harry had given me was still raw.

"Harry deemed me unsuitable for him then. Look at me, Sirius. If I were not fit for him then, how can a recovering drug addict deserve it, now."

"You always were hard on yourself, kid. I saw a spunk, a zeal for life and open eyed innocence when I saw you first. Hell, I wanted to taste that so badly then. I agre that life was not fair to you, it is generally not fair to most of us but I still see the same spunk and spirit. As for Harry, have you seen the drawings he made when he went almost crazy with his illness, those are of you and you only. For two days, his eyes seemed glued to the door waiting for you. What's all this if not declaration that he needs you as much. It's rare and special that your lost love comes back not everybody is fortunate enough. Go to Harry, sweetheart."

The look on Harry's face when I followed Sirius' advice and went to visit him made me feel ashamed of my stupidity. He was so happy like a little kid getting a lollipop.

"Hey..where were you." his voice was still weak but hoarseness was gone.

"I thought you would not want me to see you."

"You don't know Ron, how much I wanted to see you. How much I craved for you. I wish there are words to describe what I felt when I left you. I believed that I would die without saying sorry to you but I am given another chance. I am sorry. Ron. I am sorry for being such a asshole. I am sorry for running away from love. I am sorry for hurting the one person who meant a world to me. Your love was the most genuine thing I had and I foolishly threw it away. Will you ever forgive me and have me back in your life?"

The earnestness in his words, the repent in his face and purity of his heart, how could I not forgive him. He was my everything once and maybe he still was.

"Harry..I.."

"Ron, it's Harry's nap time. Let him rest. You can talk to him when he wakes up."

"Hermione , please." Harry whined, "Ron has just come."

"And I will be here only when you wake up, Harry."

Hermione and I left very reluctant and pouting Harry to sleep.

"I still can't believe he made it. Thanks, Ron. I am sorry."

It seemed like it was day for apologising.

"What for, Hermione?"

"For not believing in you. For being blind in my prejudices about you being a model. I thought you got over him so quick. There were photos of you in various parties with Draco Malfoy, I believed them. I thought you were another Oliver Wood, frivolous flirt, not good for Harry. I was completely blindsided to what you and Harry shared. I am sorry, Ron."

"Let bygones be bygones, Hermione. Harry is alright. That's what we prayed for, right."

I wonder how my life would have been if Harry and me had not fucked it up in first place. If I were not so insecure and Harry had more faith in love, the hell we both went through would never have happened. But the reality was otherwise. I was confused to where I stood with Harry. Of course I forgave him in a heartbeat. How could I not. It was our future I was confused about.

Harry started sketching again and I was once again his favourite model. Something had changed though. The jitters I used to feel when his green eyes focussed on me while he sketched, that feeling was no more instead there was warmth and care which overflowed from my heart at the sight of his frail body. One year is long time, long enough to ebb intense physical attraction I had for him but not long enough to diminish the inexplicable bond we shared.

As he made full recovery, the presence of Sirius around Harry got scarcer.

"He is itching to go, you know." Lady Minerva remarked one day," He could never stay in one place too long. He is one of those perpetual wandering souls."

"What if he found the reason to stay?" I asked.

"Maybe then he would not leave."

"Did he ever find it..the reason I mean."

"Once..long time back. You should have seen Sirius and James during those times. They were hell raisers. It is still scandalous what they had done in their youth but finally they found their matches in Remus and Lily. Being in love another man was blasphemy those days but when had Sirius cared for society."

"How was Remus like?" I asked curiously.

"The complete anathema to Sirius. They met during college. Remus was scholarship student with working class parents. He was level headed, mature, intelligent, kind but as they say love is blind. Sirius was completely besotted with Remus. He declared his love openly to his parents and was banished from family. Fortunately, his maternal grandmother left him with her inheritance. It felt like the gift from gods. I had never seen Sirius so happy. He wanted to take Remus on a trip around the world. It was supposed to be big secret which only I and James knew, not even Lily. He was supposed to pack his and Remus's luggage and surprise him with sail boat he had bought so he sent Remus and James along with Lily for some stupid errand. Harry was having his nap time. I watched three of them depart laughing and joking from the window of my room, that would be last I would be seeing them. When the news of their accident arrived, he was a wreck. He left immediately after attending the funeral making me promise that I would take care of little Harry. This family had seen lot of tragedy,may be now is the time to have some rays of sunshine."

It was hard to imagine that in this huge desolate house, once joy and laughter prevailed. It was once witness to love and rebellion of Sirius Black and Lady Minerva was last living proof of happiness it had seen."I am honoured, Ma'am, for sharing past with me. I will always respect your wishes."

"And I will respect your choice, Mr Weasley."

She left me stunned.I could not help being awed by Lady Minerva. She was one true lady. Silent and stoic. A rock support to everybody around her and astute in her observations.  
Her cryptic remark bewildered me. Had she noticed my sneaking glances at Sirius. Was I that obvious, I would not know.I do not claim to be any expert on relationships, hell, you know by now while reading this story, how messed up I am. I was puzzled about my feelings for both Harry and Sirius. The one who did not want me first now wanted to accept me or the one who accepted me first now did not want me. What a tangled web I was in.

Astoria Greengrass nee Malfoy came visiting Harry one day. Harry was once going to exhibit his paintings in her charity auction but that did not happen. She seemed lovely and was friendly to me even after all the dirty rumours regarding her husband and me were still in the air. I was ashamed of my resentment and bitterness for her. Draco Malfoy, for all his flaws could still be redeemed by that wonderful woman, Astoria. At least that chapter of my life was over and I was secretly relieved for it. It was decided that Harry's paintings would still be exhibited at next gala organised by her. Harry, ever an artist, was getting antsy in the confinement and was raring to go out.

"Hey, Ron, May I request you to be my date for the gala?" he asked my shyly.

The way his finger twitched nervously and the way he was chewing his lips when he asked me to be his date was so adorable and I could not help answering, "Of course, Harry. For you anything."

His green eyes had again started shining like emeralds and I was mesmerised by them like always. We were reaching out for each other slowly and steadily. It was tentative and gradual complete contrast to behaving like horny teenagers last time. Harry was more open and forthcoming and I was less star stuck. We behaved like friends or old acquaintances. It was warm and comforting. We hardly touched each other.  
We were both wary of our past and welcomed these little baby steps to repair what was broken.

"Wow, it would be great for you, kid and bevy of your female admirers. I am sure half of them would swoon at the sight of Harry Potter after such a long time."

"Sirius.."

Sirius. I had forgotten his presence. He was there standing, joking with Harry completely normal yet I could discern something in his eyes.He would make himself invisible when Harry and I talked and it used to feel like the time we spent together never happened or I dreamt it and in very rare moments, I would catch him looking at me with something akin to longing that it would prickle my skin. Call it intuition but I felt he was leaving us soon and in a way, he had given us his blessing.

"Are you going to come to take care of all the swooning ladies?" Harry replied back.

"Are you doubting it."

Seeing those two chatter and laugh nearly broke my heart. I wished Remus and Harry's parents were here to see them together like this. I felt like a intruder spying on personal moment between two of them.

Greengrass annual spring gala was a very important event. This time it had become talk of town due to recent nuptial between Draco Malfoy and Astoria Greengrass. Each and every member of high society was talking about it. Harry's return and his first exhibition after his near brush with death had generated a large amount of curiosity. Hermione was going to pick me up and Harry was going with Sirius. I was looking forward to see Harry back in his elements and also I was little nervous about how people were going to receive Harry's paintings of me which were going to be exhibited.

"Ron, Are you ready. C'mon hurry up. We have to pick Harry from his home too."

"Why? Sirius is supposed to accompany Harry."

"Yeah but Sirius is leaving today."

"What? but he promised Harry he will be there."

"You know how unpredictable Sirius is. He talked to Harry and Harry is okay with it. His yacht is almost ready to sail today at four o'clock."

I always had doubt that Sirius was not going to stay any more The fact that he did not come to say even goodbye to me hurt me deeply. Did he not know how important he was to me? I had an inkling in my heart that he would be going for a long long time. He would not return soon. Was I ready to accept his absence from my life completely.

"Ron..What are you doing? we are getting late."

I stood there in front of the carriage transfixed. I remember silly things like puddles on the pavement, Hermione wearing champagne coloured dress designed by Luna, broken handle of carriage door and bells from clock tower chiming one..two ..three ..and four.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It is for sloppy and uneven chapters like this one, that I wish I had some beta. Anyway. I am tempted to end the story here but I have one interesting epilogue planned and almost written so please don't hate me for ending the chapter like this.


	17. The epilogue

_The Story of my life_  
By  
Ronald Weasley.

_The autobiography of Mr. Ronald Weasley.Popularly remembered as "Red", 'The story of my life' is a journey of a poor country boy from working in a farm to modelling to the likes of Luna Lovegood. Call it a real life fairy tale or rags to riches saga, but you can not help admiring the honesty of Ronald Weasley as he lays his heart and soul bare for the readers. From describing the struggles of a newbie model to tackling the pitfalls of modelling or his addiction to drugs and various men in his life, 'The story of my life' is true confession of one of the famous celebrity of recent times._

_I, Rita Skeeter, proudly present Mr Ronald Weasley for informal Q &A regarding his book and interesting life he led._

_Rita : Welcome, Mr Weasley to our show._

_Ron: Thanks,Rita. It's always pleasure meeting you._

_Rita: The one question on everyone's mind is what made you write your memoirs._

_Ron: Actually it was suggestion of my partner. When I gave up modelling ten years ago, I felt a void inside me. I was getting restless. I had no skills except how to pout at camera . I was a school drop out, poor in studies and not very good in farm either. So after I left modelling, I had nothing to do and a lot of time in hand. It was then Adrian Pucey offered me a job to mentor young upcoming models. Seeing those fresh new faces made me realise how important it is to have some guidance so that you are not led astray in this extremely fickle profession. The glamour world is a mirage and you can get lost in it. I just wanted those young men to know my life experiences and if it helps even one person for tiniest bit, it would be my greatest achievement._

_Rita : How modelling was like in your days and how different you find it now?_

_Ron : Well, I was seventeen when I entered modelling. Before that, as everybody knows, I was a farm hand helping my brothers. We were poor family and money was the only thing which brought me here. I had no idea of what I was going into. Thankfully, in those days, male modelling was not 'it' thing and there were handful of us. The jealousies and back biting and competitions were still there but it was not as malignant as it is now._

_Rita : You became famous as 'Red'. How was fame like?_

_Ron : I never knew. I was busy working that I never enjoyed it, maybe. It is one of those things that you never know you had until you miss it._

_Rita : Why did you give it up?_

_Ron : As I said, it was something which was forced on me due to circumstances. When I look at newbies today, I marvel at their confidence and poise. I used to be so insecure and self conscious and gauche. I sincerely believe that I won't be able to make it as a model today._

_Rita : It was rumoured that you and Blaise Zabini had strings of high profile flings at the height of your career. It is said that at the blink of your eyelids, men and women were ready to lay anything on your feet during your heydays._

_Ron : Ha ha. Believe me it is exaggeration of extreme proportions. My book would definitely lays all rumours to rest._

_Rita : You came out as openly gay man ten years ago along with your partner. That was considered most daring thing at that time with both of you being so well known and famous._

_Ron : That's one of the thing I am proud of in my life. There was a stigma attached to being gay in those times. People accepted you as being gay but it should be hush hush and kept as a secret. The men who had means did not want to come out in open and I had decided early on that I would not be someone's dirty little secret._

_Rita : Did you two face any difficulties after coming out._

_Ron : We did initially but we had huge support of family and friends. You know my partner. He does not care about these things. He is a free spirit._

_Rita : You two have been together for ten years now. Tell me, has anything changed or romance is still same._

_Ron : Well, You should ask him that question. For me, he still takes my breath away. I still look forward to waking up next to him. In a way, my book is journey to finding love and I consider myself a very lucky man that I found him. He is simply the best thing that could happen to me._

_Rita : Your book has been described as modern day Cinderella. Would you agree that you have lived a fairy tale life._

_Ron : I never met fairy godmother for sure. Hmm in regard to your question, the idea of a poor naive boy achieving success appeals to everybody. People tend to see glamorous side, the beauty and tend to forget that there is always ugliness lurking in shadows. I have fought my demons. There was a time in my life when I was in pits of darkness and doing drugs was my solace.I was hurt, broken, insecure and aimless and I could not even bother to care where I ended up and woke up with but I was saved. Though I may still agree with you that I have lived fairy tale life. I was just a little boy dreaming about the world I had never seen but only read and suddenly I was in the centre of it. It was amazing journey with lots of ups and scary downs._

_Rita : And not to forget, you met your Prince Charming._

_Ron : That was the most difficult part , to believe that the guy standing before you is the one. He has taught me a lot. Can you imagine an almost illiterate guy like me writing a book. We travelled a lot. He had so much life experience and I absorbed it thoroughly. I started reading and studying again. Ten years ago, I would not be able to string up a single sentence let alone write a book. His influence in my life is overwhelming and I thank my stars everyday for his presence in my life because there was a time in the past when I had actually came close to losing him._

_Rita : Wow, what a great love story. Our audience has a request for you, Mr Weasley. Please read your favourite excerpts from the book._

_Ron : Sure, why not._

"I always had doubt that Sirius was not going to stay any more The fact that he did not come to say even goodbye to me hurt me deeply. Did he not know how important he was to me? I had an inkling in my heart that he would be going for a long long time. He would not return soon. Was I ready to accept his absence from my life completely.

"Ron..What are you doing? we are getting late."

I stood there in front of the carriage transfixed. I remember silly things like puddles on the pavement, Hermione wearing champagne coloured dress designed by Luna, broken handle of carriage door and bells from clock tower chiming one two three and four.

In the end, I could not let him go without saying goodbye. It was already four thirty and I hurried down the pier with a sunken feeling that he would not be there.

His tall silhouette was first thing I saw and my heart leapt with joy. It was then standing at the pier looking at his back, I realised that I was in love with him. When had it all started. Did it start when I saw him in pirate costume smirking at me as if he had always known it or was it when I woke up in his bed for the first time. Love for me meant what I felt for Harry, a burning passion, an inexplicable need or self destruction. It was both scary and exhilarating at the same time. Harry had power to claim me or destroy me. I used to be miserable without Harry and sometimes it used to feel that I could not breathe without him and when he was near me, I used to get madden with delight and happiness. It was crazy roller coaster ride.

I never imagined love would grow silently inside you like slow burning candlelight. It would manifest in subtle touches, encouraging words, friendly laughs and warm comforts. For me love was epitome of self destruction not a feeling which could heal a broken heart. It consumed you with desperation and vulnerability instead of giving you a silent strength. Love repairs. Love heals. Love gives you reason to live, to smile and to laugh. I had not laughed so openly till I had met him. I had not looked forward to a day with genuine delight till he entered my life. He made me happy. He made me laugh. He never asked for anything in return. He did not care that I was broken, sullied or even a country boy. He said I was perfect for him. He said he always knew. And today he was going to leave me. so that I could have my ever after with Harry. So tell me now, how could I let him go.

"Sirius.."

"Ron! What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to attend Harry's exhibition. You are his date, for christ sake."

"You were supposed to accompany him, Sirius."

"I had abrupt change in plans."

"Why?"

"Why what, Ron?"

"Why were you leaving Sirius? How could you go without saying goodbye."

"I tried, Ron. I tried my best. It was hard. It was tough. I used to look at you sitting besides Harry caring for him and hated myself for being jealous. What type of godfather is envious of his godson when poor boy is so weak and needs all the love in this world. I was disgusted with myself. I had to leave. Look at you two. You were young and made some stupid mistakes and suffered for it but now you have been given another chance. Just grab it with both hands, Ron."

"I know, Sirius. I have been given another chance, that's why I am standing here. You answer my one question and I will leave. Answer me, Sirius Black, why didn't you go then? Why are you still here."

"Because I am in love with you, dammit. Because I thought everything would be alright if I were gone . I don't want my dark shadow spoiling you and Harry's bright future. So, I packed my bags and was ready to flee. I could not do it, Ron. I could not just sail away without seeing you one last time, without telling you what you mean to me."

"You once told me that we were merely two broken people who happened to share some moments together. I did not believe it then and I don't believe it now. You are my second chance at love, Sirius. I loved Harry once madly, desperately and hopelessly and I still do but I am not that naive gullible boy anymore. I have changed. Remember how you found me, completely stoned and out of my mind. I was weak, broken , anorexic and addict. And you held my hands and I did not even realise I was falling in love with you. You made surviving possible and living pleasurable. Harry came back, Sirius, the man I had loved so devotedly and steadfastly but here I am, standing before you begging you not to go. We are two broken people but we complete each other. I love you, Sirius Black. Please take me with you as you once promised."

"Ron"

This time when we kissed there were no shadows haunting us. No flirtation, no grief, mere two men in love with each other and finally belonged together. I would not waste words to describe it, in fact, I do not even know any words to convey what it was like. Sometimes words fall short and you have to just feel it and I sincerely wish to all of you reading my story that maybe you all feel it too once in a life time.

To some of you, who must be wondering what happened to Harry, believe me, he is fine. He had overcome death and he lived. You could never underestimate his innate strength. He was my lover then he became my friend and now as Sirius jokingly claim that he is my adopted son. As for Sirius and me, we went sailing on his yacht finally but after meeting my family. You would be surprised to know how well Sirius gelled with them and he has already become very good at farm and is already dreaming about owning one.  
Seeing him making hay with my brothers, it amazed me to see how my life had come to a full circle.

Everyone has a story to tell, filled with poignant moments whether it be love or lust, faith or betrayal, truth or lies, good or bad, sin or virtue, morality or deviance, frailty or strength, tears or smile, possession or surrender, jealousy or devotion, union or dissolution... It does not matter..What matters is a life lived. So this was the story I needed to tell and maybe there are still untold stories in future waiting to be written about."


End file.
